Guild Wars 2

Cue Music
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fe8Y40pWTH0

Turns toward the camera, a soft smile on the battle worn Charr’s face

“Salutations people of Tyria…. growing up in the Plains of Ashford, I’ve seen many folks wondering about, the same look on their face as they ask themselves. What happens next?”

Starts walking outside, cubs running about with toy swords and pretending to be Destiny’s Edge

“What happens next? After Zhaitan rose and, attacked our people. After the flame legion and dredge teamed up. After the beaches of Southsun Cove saw the fugitive Canach bring chaos to the sandy shores. After the tragic event that occurred during Dragon Bash. What happens next?”

Catches a frisby cause those exist now

“I’ll tell you what happens next. Progress. Progress, to a better Tyria, where we look out toward the Elder Dragons and think… Yeah, that’s doable. Progress toward making sure that when you go after Stonemist castle, you have the siege, and the spirit, to knock down those doors and say, Hi, i’m from server number 7 and we think your face should be a canoe!”

Is now on a volcano catching another frisby, this one however, is purple

“Evon. Now that Charr, his jib is cut just right. He took the Black Lion Trading Company, and turned it from just another merchant you find in the only town in the area with an anvil, to becoming one of the most prominent companies around. When you buy your omnomberry bars, or that extra piece of, mythril… his staff personally wraps and presents that item for you, at a convienient location. It’s amazing really, all they’ve done for us…”

Is now a sock puppet

“But Kiel? She doesn’t want, progression… she wants, efficiency, and while I can admire that I have to say she DOESN”T KNOW WHAT THE #%^@ SHE’S DOING, I M……apologies, I get a little, steamed when I think of that women, with all her incompetence, needing fellow adventurers to do all the work for her, just so she can get the credit for it…. just, ruffles my fur, you know?"

Is now two sock puppets and, a frisby

“When I was on top of Stonemist, firing off Trebuchets toward the enemy towers of Quentin Lake and Durios, I said to myself… man, sure am glad that Kiel lady ain’t one with authority, else she might take claim for when those walls go down and the tower is captured.”

Walks casually along the roads of Lion’s Arch

“The elections are coming, and Evon needs your support. While he is a man of means, he can only do so much unless he has the help of you. Yes my friend you. No, no, not you… you. Yes, you… with the hat. We need people like you. Cause if we don’t elect who’s right, the man with the key to our hearts, then we might as well just, commit suicide. Yep just, take a long dagger, start cutting into our femoral arteries… just bleed out, all over the floor. Could lay you down, right on your belly, lay my greatsword down by your neck, just a quick swish down, be like a paper cutter, you wouldn’t even feel it though the blood would pool and we’d have to make sure to have enough proper clean sheets and towels to, wipe everything up and of course the Norn’s neck is quite firm and would take maybe three, or four chops and… well… I digress… "

Is now Joe Cool, King of Vermont

“When elections come, make the right choice. Vote for Evon, vote for the Charr that is looking out for the folks around him. Looking out, for you~”

Walks off into the sunrise and then becomes a MUTHA FLIPPIN FIREBALL AND GOES TO BATTLE MECHA-UNICORNS! Cause why not got a problem with that, I will fight you on the side of the street!