Guild Wars 2

Since the last thread went to hell when some forumgoers couldn’t keep the whine out of their posts because the game isn’t what they want to play.

Again, the rules:

1. You get to make a wish, then the next person corrupts it.

ex.

wish- I wish for a Colin Johanson minipet

corrupted- it will keep attacking you as long it is out

2. Keep balance (read: nerf and buff kitten) and grievances against Anet, the game, and the community out of your post. Otherwise, it will be disqualified and should not be replied to.

3. You may include non-GW2 stuff in your wish.

4. Be creative and have fun!

Here goes: I wish Elementalists got new utilites for stealth.

Granted. Elementalists can now detect stealthed enemies in the general area of 1,200 units. It won’t tell you where they are though.

I wish GW2 was better-optimized.

Draco.2806:

Granted. Elementalists can now detect stealthed enemies in the general area of 1,200 units. It won’t tell you where they are though.

I wish GW2 was better-optimized.

Meant being able to stealth, but that was pretty funny.

But you’re disqualified.

Next post is free to make a wish.

I wish a giant mega-troll would spawn and rampage through all major cities and zones, killing every player and npc, rip thier heads off, stomp on them, stick them on spikes and set them on fire. Then burn every city to the ground and kill all the armor repair NPCs permanently.

JustTrogdor.7892:

I wish a giant mega-troll would spawn and rampage through all major cities and zones, killing every player and npc, rip thier heads off, stomp on them, stick them on spikes and set them on fire. Then burn every city to the ground and kill all the armor repair NPCs permanently.

Gonna hijack this to save the thread.

The giant mega-troll becomes a fun world boss for players to beat.

Equipment no longer have the “durability” stat.

I wish Logan gets a girlfriend.

I know I will be disqualified, but…wow. Just wow!

Congratulations! You’re Logan’s girlfriend.

You’re a man? Not tonight, you aren’t.

I wish that Guardians got a longbow that fired death lasers.

foofad.5162:

I wish that Guardians got a longbow that fired death lasers.

The lasers have 240 sec CD and do 40 damage.

I wish a precursor for everyone.

foofad.5162:

Congratulations! You’re Logan’s girlfriend.

You’re a man? Not tonight, you aren’t.

I wish that Guardians got a longbow that fired death lasers.

Oh.

Oh!

OHHHHHHNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Fox Soul.4809:

foofad.5162:

I wish that Guardians got a longbow that fired death lasers.

The lasers have 240 sec CD and do 40 damage.

I wish a precursor for everyone.

Everyone gets a precursor. Legendary’s promptly removed from the game.

I wish Ritualists would comeback

ViperSlayer.3941:

Everyone gets a precursor. Legendary’s promptly removed from the game.

I wish Ritualists would comeback

Ritualists return but then giant mega-troll spawns and rips all their heads off, throws their bodies into the mystic forge which spawns mega-troll’s wife and together they burninate the country side and the peasants.

I wish Mesmers had a permanent swiftness buff.

Fox Soul.4809:

foofad.5162:

I wish that Guardians got a longbow that fired death lasers.

The lasers have 240 sec CD and do 40 damage.

I wish a precursor for everyone.

Granted, every account now has a precursor, unfortunately it is part of the “town clothes”.

I wish rangers could move while using barrage.

JustTrogdor.7892:

ViperSlayer.3941:

Everyone gets a precursor. Legendary’s promptly removed from the game.

I wish Ritualists would comeback

Ritualists return but then giant mega-troll spawns and rips all their heads off, throws their bodies into the mystic forge which spawns mega-troll’s wife and together they burninate the country side and the peasants.

I wish Mesmers had a permanent swiftness buff.

Granted, but the buff required 2 GrandMaster Traits.
I wish more dungeons and fractals, that provided a really challenge.

Fox Soul.4809:

JustTrogdor.7892:

ViperSlayer.3941:

Everyone gets a precursor. Legendary’s promptly removed from the game.

I wish Ritualists would comeback

Ritualists return but then giant mega-troll spawns and rips all their heads off, throws their bodies into the mystic forge which spawns mega-troll’s wife and together they burninate the country side and the peasants.

I wish Mesmers had a permanent swiftness buff.

Granted, but the buff required 2 GrandMaster Traits.
I wish more dungeons and fractals, that provided a really challenge.

I’m on the fence about this… I’ll let it slide.

for now.

You get your dungeons and fractals but they are impossible to beat.

I WISH FOR UNICORNS.

Azunai.5974:

You get your dungeons and fractals but they are impossible to beat.

I WISH FOR UNICORNS.

Granted, you now own The Dreamer and it is the only weapon you can use on any of your characters.

I wish for better medium armor aside from trench coats.

JustTrogdor.7892:

Azunai.5974:

You get your dungeons and fractals but they are impossible to beat.

I WISH FOR UNICORNS.

I wish for more, new looks for medium armor.

Fixed.

You bet your kitten I’m watching this thread like a hawk.

Justice never sleeps.

JustTrogdor.7892:

Azunai.5974:

You get your dungeons and fractals but they are impossible to beat.

I WISH FOR UNICORNS.

Granted, you now own The Dreamer and it is the only weapon you can use on any of your characters.

I wish for better medium armor aside from trench coats.

Granted, and i must say you look fantastic in those chaps now!

I wish my holographic wings could make me fly.

Azunai.5974:

JustTrogdor.7892:

Azunai.5974:

You get your dungeons and fractals but they are impossible to beat.

I WISH FOR UNICORNS.

I wish for more, new looks for medium armor.

Fixed.

You bet your kitten I’m watching this thread like a hawk.

Justice never sleeps.

Justice may never sleep, but it does sometimes sit too long on the toilet thereby rendering your mobility nil from “sleepy leg syndrome”.

I wish for Ranger pet’s to have their AI improved in regards to hitting moving targets.

noctern.5213:

Granted, and i must say you look fantastic in those chaps now!

I wish my holographic wings could make me fly.

Granted but the only place they take you is SAB W2 Trib mode which you have to complete in less than 5 minutes before you can go back to world. Logging out and back in will not work.

I wish when I complete a jumping puzzle I am showered with valuable gifts, all of Tyria cheers over my greatness and women throw themselves at me in real life.

JustTrogdor.7892:

noctern.5213:

Granted, and i must say you look fantastic in those chaps now!

I wish my holographic wings could make me fly.

Granted but the only place they take you is SAB W2 Trib mode which you have to complete in less than 5 minutes before you can go back to world. Logging out and back in will not work.

I wish when I complete a jumping puzzle I am showered with valuable gifts, all of Tyria cheers over my greatness and women throw themselves at me in real life.

Granted, women will now throw themselves at you but they all used to be named Dave.

C-C-C-Combo Breaker!!!

ShadowPuppet.3746:

JustTrogdor.7892:

noctern.5213:

Granted, and i must say you look fantastic in those chaps now!

I wish my holographic wings could make me fly.

Granted but the only place they take you is SAB W2 Trib mode which you have to complete in less than 5 minutes before you can go back to world. Logging out and back in will not work.

I wish when I complete a jumping puzzle I am showered with valuable gifts, all of Tyria cheers over my greatness and women throw themselves at me in real life.

Granted, women will now throw themselves at you but they all used to be named Dave.

You are meant to make a wish

i wish I could see inside of locked chests before i opened them

noctern.5213:

ShadowPuppet.3746:

JustTrogdor.7892:

noctern.5213:

Granted, and i must say you look fantastic in those chaps now!

I wish my holographic wings could make me fly.

Granted but the only place they take you is SAB W2 Trib mode which you have to complete in less than 5 minutes before you can go back to world. Logging out and back in will not work.

I wish when I complete a jumping puzzle I am showered with valuable gifts, all of Tyria cheers over my greatness and women throw themselves at me in real life.

Granted, women will now throw themselves at you but they all used to be named Dave.

You are meant to make a wish

i wish I could see inside of locked chests before i opened them

Granted, but all you will ever see is disappointment.

I wish for people to stop crying about Warriors.

Sykper.6583:

noctern.5213:

ShadowPuppet.3746:

JustTrogdor.7892:

noctern.5213:

Granted, and i must say you look fantastic in those chaps now!

I wish my holographic wings could make me fly.

Granted but the only place they take you is SAB W2 Trib mode which you have to complete in less than 5 minutes before you can go back to world. Logging out and back in will not work.

I wish when I complete a jumping puzzle I am showered with valuable gifts, all of Tyria cheers over my greatness and women throw themselves at me in real life.

Granted, women will now throw themselves at you but they all used to be named Dave.

You are meant to make a wish

i wish I could see inside of locked chests before i opened them

Granted, but all you will ever see is disappointment.

I wish for people to stop crying about Warriors.

Granted, now every NPC you pass as a warrior throws rotten fruit and veg at you.

I wish my necro pets could talk

Granted. Each minion uses Trahearne’s voice set, in a slightly different pitch.

Moving on.

I wish my character could get romantically involved with an NPC like in Mass Effect.

foofad.5162:

Granted. Each minion uses Trahearne’s voice set, in a slightly different pitch.

Moving on.

I wish my character could get romantically involved with an NPC like in Mass Effect.

…. You only get to be romantically involved with Trahearne. HAH.

I wish we can fish.

I wish for blood effects in combat.

Azunai.5974:

foofad.5162:

Granted. Each minion uses Trahearne’s voice set, in a slightly different pitch.

Moving on.

I wish my character could get romantically involved with an NPC like in Mass Effect.

…. You only get to be romantically involved with Trahearne. HAH.

I wish we can fish.

Granted, but only while in a full party and if all are drinking at the time.

I wish we could use our crafting skills to build our own houses.

noctern.5213:

Granted, but only while in a full party and if all are drinking at the time.

I wish we could use our crafting skills to build our own houses.

Granted but houses are of Ascended quality and require ascended materials and crafting to 1000 in all 8 crafts.

I wish the stack limit was changed to 500.

JustTrogdor.7892:

noctern.5213:

Granted, but only while in a full party and if all are drinking at the time.

I wish we could use our crafting skills to build our own houses.

Granted but houses are of Ascended quality and require ascended materials and crafting to 1000 in all 8 crafts.

I wish the stack limit was changed to 500.

Granted, but you’ll have to pay 10g taxes weekly per item stack that exceeds 250 or the items get confiscated.

I wish they’d replace Last Refuge trait on Thieves with something totally different.

Doggie.3184:

Granted, but you’ll have to pay 10g taxes weekly per item stack that exceeds 250 or the items get confiscated.

I wish they’d replace Last Refuge trait on Thieves with something totally different.

Granted. Last Refuge is replaced with Everlasting Refuge…thieves cast Shadow Refuge with every 10% health lost with a 10 second cool down.

I wish Fine-Transmutation stones unlocked skins and put them in a locker a-la PvP or the Achievement tab.

Doggie.3184:

JustTrogdor.7892:

noctern.5213:

Granted, but only while in a full party and if all are drinking at the time.

I wish we could use our crafting skills to build our own houses.

Granted but houses are of Ascended quality and require ascended materials and crafting to 1000 in all 8 crafts.

I wish the stack limit was changed to 500.

Granted, but you’ll have to pay 10g taxes weekly per item stack that exceeds 250 or the items get confiscated.

I wish they’d replace Last Refuge trait on Thieves with something totally different.

Granted – you now have the “something totally different” skill – when you use it you stun yourself and make yourself vunerable for 5 sec

I wish I had a boat to save me swimming witht he sharks all the time.

Vorch.2985:

Doggie.3184:

Granted, but you’ll have to pay 10g taxes weekly per item stack that exceeds 250 or the items get confiscated.

I wish they’d replace Last Refuge trait on Thieves with something totally different.

Granted. Last Refuge is replaced with Everlasting Refuge…thieves cast Shadow Refuge with every 10% health lost with a 10 second cool down.

I wish Fine-Transmutation stones unlocked skins and put them in a locker a-la PvP or the Achievement tab.

Granted – the skins are for appearance only and can not be used in anyway.

see wish above

noctern.5213:

Doggie.3184:

JustTrogdor.7892:

noctern.5213:

Granted, but only while in a full party and if all are drinking at the time.

I wish we could use our crafting skills to build our own houses.

Granted but houses are of Ascended quality and require ascended materials and crafting to 1000 in all 8 crafts.

I wish the stack limit was changed to 500.

Granted, but you’ll have to pay 10g taxes weekly per item stack that exceeds 250 or the items get confiscated.

I wish they’d replace Last Refuge trait on Thieves with something totally different.

Granted – you now have the “something totally different” skill – when you use it you stun yourself and make yourself vunerable for 5 sec

I wish I had a boat to save me swimming witht he sharks all the time.

You`ll get your boat, but the captain and its entire crew give you the “stare”.

That said.. i wish to win the lottery next week!

Sandra Martino.3870:

noctern.5213:

Doggie.3184:

JustTrogdor.7892:

noctern.5213:

Granted, but only while in a full party and if all are drinking at the time.

I wish we could use our crafting skills to build our own houses.

Granted but houses are of Ascended quality and require ascended materials and crafting to 1000 in all 8 crafts.

I wish the stack limit was changed to 500.

Granted, but you’ll have to pay 10g taxes weekly per item stack that exceeds 250 or the items get confiscated.

I wish they’d replace Last Refuge trait on Thieves with something totally different.

Granted – you now have the “something totally different” skill – when you use it you stun yourself and make yourself vunerable for 5 sec

I wish I had a boat to save me swimming witht he sharks all the time.

You`ll get your boat, but the captain and its entire crew give you the “stare”.

That said.. i wish to win the lottery next week!

Granted – Congratulations I am sure you and Trahearne will be very happy, you did know he was the first division prize.

I wish I could organise the dredge to be my minions.

noctern.5213:

Sandra Martino.3870:

noctern.5213:

Doggie.3184:

JustTrogdor.7892:

noctern.5213:

Granted, but only while in a full party and if all are drinking at the time.

I wish we could use our crafting skills to build our own houses.

Granted but houses are of Ascended quality and require ascended materials and crafting to 1000 in all 8 crafts.

I wish the stack limit was changed to 500.

Granted, but you’ll have to pay 10g taxes weekly per item stack that exceeds 250 or the items get confiscated.

I wish they’d replace Last Refuge trait on Thieves with something totally different.

Granted – you now have the “something totally different” skill – when you use it you stun yourself and make yourself vunerable for 5 sec

I wish I had a boat to save me swimming witht he sharks all the time.

You`ll get your boat, but the captain and its entire crew give you the “stare”.

That said.. i wish to win the lottery next week!

Granted – Congratulations I am sure you and Trahearne will be very happy, you did know he was the first division prize.

I wish I could organise the dredge to be my minions.

Granted, but dredges will start a revolution and kill you IRL.

I wish new weapons for all classes.

Fox Soul.4809:

noctern.5213:

Sandra Martino.3870:

noctern.5213:

Doggie.3184:

JustTrogdor.7892:

noctern.5213:

Granted, but only while in a full party and if all are drinking at the time.

I wish we could use our crafting skills to build our own houses.

Granted but houses are of Ascended quality and require ascended materials and crafting to 1000 in all 8 crafts.

I wish the stack limit was changed to 500.

Granted, but you’ll have to pay 10g taxes weekly per item stack that exceeds 250 or the items get confiscated.

I wish they’d replace Last Refuge trait on Thieves with something totally different.

Granted – you now have the “something totally different” skill – when you use it you stun yourself and make yourself vunerable for 5 sec

I wish I had a boat to save me swimming witht he sharks all the time.

You`ll get your boat, but the captain and its entire crew give you the “stare”.

That said.. i wish to win the lottery next week!

Granted – Congratulations I am sure you and Trahearne will be very happy, you did know he was the first division prize.

I wish I could organise the dredge to be my minions.

Granted, but dredges will start a revolution and kill you IRL.

I wish new weapons for all classes.

Granted – Super efficient nuclear powered laser weaponry for your classes – unfortunately they are unshielded so you die of radiation poisoning before being able to use them.

I wish i could run faster then a centaur.

noctern.5213:

Granted – Super efficient nuclear powered laser weaponry for your classes – unfortunately they are unshielded so you die of radiation poisoning before being able to use them.

I wish i could run faster then a centaur.

Granted but as soon as you pass the centaur in a race giant mega-troll and his giant mega-troll wife spawns and rips your characters head off, smashes it into the centaur head causing both heads to explode and giant mega-troll’s wife uses the mess to make dye for her new dress made from baby Quaggan skin.

I wish my ranger pets had clothes.

JustTrogdor.7892:

noctern.5213:

Granted – Super efficient nuclear powered laser weaponry for your classes – unfortunately they are unshielded so you die of radiation poisoning before being able to use them.

I wish i could run faster then a centaur.

Granted but as soon as you pass the centaur in a race giant mega-troll and his giant mega-troll wife spawns and rips your characters head off, smashes it into the centaur head causing both heads to explode and giant mega-troll’s wife uses the mess to make dye for her new dress made from baby Quaggan skin.

I wish my ranger pets had clothes.

Granted, unfortunately the polyester material the clothes are made from gernate a huge static charge and detonate your pet.

I wish I could be a Dev

JustTrogdor.7892:

Granted but as soon as you pass the centaur in a race giant mega-troll and his giant mega-troll wife spawns and rips your characters head off, smashes it into the centaur head causing both heads to explode and giant mega-troll’s wife uses the mess to make dye for her new dress made from baby Quaggan skin.

I wish my ranger pets had clothes.

Granted but all their clothes is invisible.

I wish for an engie minigun kit

noctern.5213:

JustTrogdor.7892:

noctern.5213:

Granted – Super efficient nuclear powered laser weaponry for your classes – unfortunately they are unshielded so you die of radiation poisoning before being able to use them.

I wish i could run faster then a centaur.

Granted but as soon as you pass the centaur in a race giant mega-troll and his giant mega-troll wife spawns and rips your characters head off, smashes it into the centaur head causing both heads to explode and giant mega-troll’s wife uses the mess to make dye for her new dress made from baby Quaggan skin.

I wish my ranger pets had clothes.

Granted, unfortunately the polyester material the clothes are made from gernate a huge static charge and detonate your pet.

I wish I could be a Dev

Granted, unfortunately Anet’s development team is full and you have been assigned to Hello Kitty Online.

I wish using engineer grenade kit did not give me carpal tunnel!

Granted, you now have no hands.

I wish ranger pets could be told to fetch.

ShadowPuppet.3746:

noctern.5213:

JustTrogdor.7892:

noctern.5213:

Granted – Super efficient nuclear powered laser weaponry for your classes – unfortunately they are unshielded so you die of radiation poisoning before being able to use them.

I wish i could run faster then a centaur.

Granted but as soon as you pass the centaur in a race giant mega-troll and his giant mega-troll wife spawns and rips your characters head off, smashes it into the centaur head causing both heads to explode and giant mega-troll’s wife uses the mess to make dye for her new dress made from baby Quaggan skin.

I wish my ranger pets had clothes.

Granted, unfortunately the polyester material the clothes are made from gernate a huge static charge and detonate your pet.

I wish I could be a Dev

Granted, unfortunately Anet’s development team is full and you have been assigned to Hello Kitty Online.

I wish using engineer grenade kit did not give me carpal tunnel!

Granted – grenade kit has been removed – also as Anet is a caring company your account has been suspended to allow you to recover – on the bright side you are given a free sub to Hello Kitty Online.

I wish we could play as Giants

noctern.5213:

Granted – grenade kit has been removed – also as Anet is a caring company your account has been suspended to allow you to recover – on the bright side you are given a free sub to Hello Kitty Online.

I wish we could play as Giants

Granted but then giant mega-troll…. Ahhh just kidding someone else take Noctern’s