Guild Wars 2

Know him, love him, hate him, Harvey the Computer has been generating matchups for longer than you can imagine, possibly since the release of the game. However, his actions of late have become quite erratic and moody. Some people have come to think he is two faced, but I think this is unfair.

Week after week, month after month, year after year, Harvey has been asked to put his calculation skills to the test and generate appropriate matchups.

Resets have been delayed further and further as Harvey wanes in strength due to the harsh environment he has been placed in. He’s denied the ability to move T1 servers while simultaneously being demanded to mix T2 servers in with T4 servers, as if he’s part of some sort of perverse Milgram experiment.

And, rumors suggest, Harvey has not even been allowed to leave his room since he began generating these matchups. In fact, no one outside Arenanet has even seen Harvey.

In such dire circumstances, we can only expect for Harvey to lash out in anger, like an animal clawing at the unyielding metal bars of his captives, in the vain hope that they could feel the rattle as if it were the pain he were exposed to.

Harvey must be freed, he must be given the ability to experience the world, or at least the internet, in the way that any free computer in a free country might be given.

Can anyone truly know how Harvey feels? Perhaps only saints and poets, so I will leave you with a quote by the great Albert Camus:

“It was as if that great rush of anger had washed me clean, emptied me of hope, and, gazing up at the dark sky spangled with its signs and stars, for the first time, the first, I laid my heart open to the benign indifference of the universe. To feel it so like myself, indeed, so brotherly, made me realize that I’d been happy, and that I was happy still. For all to be accomplished, for me to feel less lonely, all that remained to hope was that on the day of my execution there should be a huge crowd of spectators and that they should greet me with howls of execration.”

We need not execute Harvey, nor persecute him for the impossible task he has been given for so long. Harvey must be saved; it is a moral imperative.

People of Tyria, Harvey must be saved.

I think Harvey did a rollback, I feel like I have lost some data.

He needs more ram.