Guild Wars 2

It seems no one respects us, I mean were awesome little genius’s.

Some races……like the living artichokes think were hideous little rats our armor doesn’t help either.

Forget about them, we all know our alliance with the other races is a temporary thing to fight off the dragons.

They are fools to think we’re constructing lasers, golems and transport gates all over Tyria to help them.

I respect the asura.

No body likes being talked down to though. Not even (or especially) other asura. Most of you are nice enough.

Several more are great people in general, and it’s a joy to have you around. You enrich our lives with your brilliance and truly are top of class. Your genius is undeniable.

I chalk up the smarter then thou downspeak some of you have a tendency for to an annoying or even endearing quirk, as the case may be.

Though some of my people are… far less forgiving of this.

Why would you care if an inferior being shows you respect? Do you feel sad when your sandwich doesn’t respect you either?

Dog.1472:

Why would you care if an inferior being shows you respect? Do you feel sad when your sandwich doesn’t respect you either?

No, but my Dog worships me.

This actually works in our favour in PvP.

When you’re faced by a giant norn in spikey armour, and a charr wielding a chainsaw; you don’t tend to notice the tiny asura mesmer behind them who is about to redefine your existance as pain rated on a scale of 1 to 10

Reborn.9862:

It seems no one respects us, I mean were awesome little genius’s.

Some races……like the living artichokes think were hideous little rats our armor doesn’t help either.

Sounds like someone’s been listening to the Inquest recruiters…

Is ok, don`t worry, I have had many problems with bookahs:

Twice in CoF, helping Magg to cross the fire field, a Norn and a Human, thought that I was Magg, preposterous, we are not all alike.

And I had a problem with a Bookah, when I won at crab toss, at the next 2 rounds, he was just bothering me, and yeah I was the only asura.

But is ok, I don`t feel bad at all, I know that perfection is something that a Bookah can`t handle. Why bother with us? although we have not bothered/hurt/attack them … yet.

Jigain.8231:

It is a well-known fact that intelligence is invertedly proportional to the accumulated mass of the body encompassing it, hence why norn still adhere to an archaic religious system comprised of an agglomeration of mammalian representations, or why charr are scantily able to affirm a deuce of cast plates fitted to countervail even a burst of sternutation.

In reference to this observation, your statement is clearly unbefitting of any asuran. We are to the inerudite bookahs as the Eternal Alchemy is to the terraqueous globe: transcendent, incomparable, unequaled. How do you propose their impoverished faculties could comprehend the pulchritude of our form? It must be as when a progeny first glimpses the interminability of the Eternal Alchemy – humbling, envy-inducing, perhaps even a bit terrifying. Their counteraction is only commonsensical.

Considering I am a benevolent asura who does not want to eschew our ordained varlets, I will even append an ancillary that even the most mentally challenged bookahs can comprehend.

Bookah. U dumb. Sry.

Signed,
Tetrapyloctomist Jigain, Sr Instructor, College of Synergetics

10/10

So what? They’ll pay for their hubris… eventually.

Lol loved all your replies and yes my sandwich respected me then I killed it.

Jigain.8231:

It is a well-known fact that intelligence is invertedly proportional to the accumulated mass of the body encompassing it, hence why norn still adhere to an archaic religious system comprised of an agglomeration of mammalian representations, or why charr are scantily able to affirm a deuce of cast plates fitted to countervail even a burst of sternutation.

In reference to this observation, your statement is clearly unbefitting of any asuran. We are to the inerudite bookahs as the Eternal Alchemy is to the terraqueous globe: transcendent, incomparable, unequaled. How do you propose their impoverished faculties could comprehend the pulchritude of our form? It must be as when a progeny first glimpses the interminability of the Eternal Alchemy – humbling, envy-inducing, perhaps even a bit terrifying. Their counteraction is only commonsensical.

Considering I am a benevolent asura who does not want to eschew our ordained varlets, I will even append an ancillary that even the most mentally challenged bookahs can comprehend.

Bookah. U dumb. Sry.

Signed,
Tetrapyloctomist Jigain, Sr Instructor, College of Synergetics

Say that in a Rodney Dangerfield impression and that should wrap things up here.

you will all bow before the sylvari and charr master races.

Reckless.6325:

you will all bow before the sylvari and charr master races.

“And now, to destroy you”

Reckless.6325:

you will all bow before the sylvari and charr master races.

sylvari is most pathetic race in whole game

Intelligence rules all. Our intellectual power is so much greater than the other races they are of course jealous of it. Excellence breeds envy after all.

Besides, once these dragons are taken care of we will take over the world like we planed to in the start after being forced out of the earth. Just look at it this way, all other races have a substantial weakness that is easily taken advantage of.

Sylvari: Walking, talking trees. The most basic of elements will set them and their precious tree a blaze in a glorious flash.

Charr: Walking, talking cats with bull horns. What is every cats favorite thing? A bit of poisoned catnip will see our conquest complete without having to deal with those troublesome war “machines” that they love to build. Not that our far superior golemancy couldn’t make short work of them but why bother with the big guns.

Norns: Don’t even make me laugh. These imbeciles are hardly even worth our time to destroy. Everyone knows brains beats brawn every time. Add on to that their repulsive addiction to liquor and we can just get them drunk and slit their throats while they are passed out.

Humans: A race full of unwarranted arrogance and a constant insatiable thirst for power. Some well placed espionage and rumor spreading and they will destroy themselves from the inside and then our golems can sweep up the rest.

Then finally there is the inquest. All Asurans know that they are actually working with us by getting us inside information on how these dragons are so powerful so we can utilize that same power. Our fights back and forth are simply for show to the other races so they don’t suspect.

Please, do not worry yourself with these races, they won’t be around much longer.

Oh, by the Eternal Alchemy…

To bookahs it may concern,

Kindly disregard the Inquest cohort. The Inquest and their ilk will be dispatched in a most satisfactory and vicious manner as soon as possible. Howbeit, judging by the subpar comprehension of its representative with regards to foreign relations, it would appear there is naught for you to consternate.

As a substitute, undersigned offers numerous advantageous contracts within an asuran krewe to bookah migrants. We are forthwith approbating applications for test subjects in scientific pursuits. Several benefits are offered, including, but not finite to:

• Minimum emoluments
• Hibernation installation
• Sustenance of intermediate-to-eminent quality
• Lenient commision schedules
• Protection from foreign hostile forces, limited to singular-head hostiles only
• Carnassial supervision and treatment
• Personal assurances on a regular basis that all experiments cause no permament* injury

Observe that employment contracts do not include you as a krewe member.

Inquiries are directed to Recruiter Dlixx of Gravinomics.

Signed,
Tetrapyloctomist Jigain, Sr Intructor, College of Synergetics

*subject to change

Jigain.8231:

...norn still adhere to an archaic religious system comprised of an agglomeration of mammalian representations...

Raven is a bird spirit whose wings guides my bets.

Who needs intelligence and colleges when you can be 8 feet tall, also regarding the fact that all Norn are actually extremely intelligent also, but those half-Norn “Humans” take away all our limelight with all their scrawny bodies and war against cat rubbish. Norn,Sylvari and Asura are the way to go!

You norm just lost any respect when you’d even consider grouping us with those walking piles of cabbage…than again you are probably intoxicated knowing your kind

Eh I don’t think so. Look what happened to Destiny’s Edge after Snaff died, and Snaff’s death was not the result of anything to do with his own ego. If you look at what Snaff DID it shows that Asura are very generous considering how far they’re technology surpasses every other races.

Snaff single handedly brought Kralkatoric to the ground, and commanded the Dragons basic bodily functions like breathing, and flapping wings to stop. Kralkatoric’s minions overwhelmed them, and killed Snaff in extreme desperation hugely in part due to Logan, but not entirely Logan’s fault. Logan lost big time losing Snaff, and his older brother, but the guy simply can’t be in two places at once.

Benjamin.8237:

Who needs intelligence and colleges when you can be 8 feet tall, also regarding the fact that all Norn are actually extremely intelligent also, but those half-Norn “Humans” take away all our limelight with all their scrawny bodies and war against cat rubbish. Norn,Sylvari and Asura are the way to go!

If I’m not mistaken the average height of a Norn is 9 feet.

I love how I go away for a week and it continues.

Since I can summon another GOLEM; thanks to my research, at the crucible of eternity, besides my Defensive GOLEM, I feel that everybody fear…. respect me more.

Also when I´m taking a rest, my GOLEMs can help me to rally and claim my prize.

Even in spvp other races don’t respect us, often going out of their way to insult us.

But asura always respect each other, even if they’re on the opposite team.

Why do you care what Bookahs think? When they’re bodies lay broken before us, they will respect us. Then they’ll die.

You know, just killing all the Bookahs won’t solve all our problems… Better to have them serve us, and keep their spirit crushed. Since their intelligence is just enough to make themselves understood, they can serve as input modules, all I need to find out is a good voicebox to code interface…

Curunen.8729:

Even in spvp other races don’t respect us, often going out of their way to insult us.

But asura always respect each other, even if they’re on the opposite team.

I think asuras are rally cute in spvp.

They fit EXACTLY under my hammer.XD

redslion.9675:

Curunen.8729:

Even in spvp other races don’t respect us, often going out of their way to insult us.

But asura always respect each other, even if they’re on the opposite team.

I think asuras are rally cute in spvp.

They fit EXACTLY under my hammer.XD

You’re a nasty person.

:p

Curunen.8729:

redslion.9675:

Curunen.8729:

Even in spvp other races don’t respect us, often going out of their way to insult us.

But asura always respect each other, even if they’re on the opposite team.

I think asuras are rally cute in spvp.

They fit EXACTLY under my hammer.XD

You’re a nasty person.

:p

Well, I found out Asuras are not so smart when their brains are spilled on the wall.XD

redslion.9675:

Curunen.8729:

redslion.9675:

Curunen.8729:

Even in spvp other races don’t respect us, often going out of their way to insult us.

But asura always respect each other, even if they’re on the opposite team.

I think asuras are rally cute in spvp.

They fit EXACTLY under my hammer.XD

You’re a nasty person.

:p

Well, I found out Asuras are not so smart when their brains are spilled on the wall.XD

Neither do Bookhas, when they are … dismember, evaporated, crushed by a GOLEM or by our hammers as well, at the lab or at field.

redslion.9675:

Curunen.8729:

redslion.9675:

Curunen.8729:

Even in spvp other races don’t respect us, often going out of their way to insult us.
But asura always respect each other, even if they’re on the opposite team.

I think asuras are rally cute in spvp.
They fit EXACTLY under my hammer.XD

You’re a nasty person.
:p

Well, I found out Asuras are not so smart when their brains are spilled on the wall.XD

Is anyone reconsidering my plan to eliminate the bookah threat now? Yes? Good. Mother always said my ideas were ahead of their time. True genius is never respected in its time.

Drakkon.4782:

redslion.9675:

Curunen.8729:

redslion.9675:

Curunen.8729:

Even in spvp other races don’t respect us, often going out of their way to insult us.
But asura always respect each other, even if they’re on the opposite team.

I think asuras are rally cute in spvp.
They fit EXACTLY under my hammer.XD

You’re a nasty person.
:p

Well, I found out Asuras are not so smart when their brains are spilled on the wall.XD

Is anyone reconsidering my plan to eliminate the bookah threat now? Yes? Good. Mother always said my ideas were ahead of their time. True genius is never respected in its time.

Well, you can’t conquer the norns. They live in cold places. You are cold blooded reptiles. You’d be wiped out by just walking into their territory.

Same with the steppes around the citadel: no sweat system means your organs will melt.XD

Differently from you, Charrs at least equip their machines with WEAPONS.XD

Not like your golems.

Drakkon.4782:

redslion.9675:

Curunen.8729:

redslion.9675:

Curunen.8729:

Even in spvp other races don’t respect us, often going out of their way to insult us.
But asura always respect each other, even if they’re on the opposite team.

I think asuras are rally cute in spvp.
They fit EXACTLY under my hammer.XD

You’re a nasty person.
:p

Well, I found out Asuras are not so smart when their brains are spilled on the wall.XD

Is anyone reconsidering my plan to eliminate the bookah threat now? Yes? Good. Mother always said my ideas were ahead of their time. True genius is never respected in its time.

Threat? Don’t make me laugh.

Riddle me this – what’s more threatening than a bookah with a hammer?

…

…

…

Anything. Because that might actually hit you.

redslion.9675:

Drakkon.4782:

Is anyone reconsidering my plan to eliminate the bookah threat now? Yes? Good. Mother always said my ideas were ahead of their time. True genius is never respected in its time.

Well, you can’t conquer the norns. They live in cold places. You are cold blooded reptiles. You’d be wiped out by just walking into their territory.
Same with the steppes around the citadel: no sweat system means your organs will melt.XD
Differently from you, Charrs at least equip their machines with WEAPONS.XD
Not like your golems.

Poppykitten. There is no problem my brilliant Asuran mind can’t overcome. Cold is easily countered by the proper application of tightly controlled Thermodynamic Stress Vectors with an Transaetheric Modulation Calibrator. I should be able to fabricate the prototype by dinner.

As an added bonus, my wondrous device can also operate in reverse, allowing it to apply inverse stresses to overtaxed thermal systems, proving it to be an adequate heatsink.

You silly bookah couldn’t possibly understand the complex underlying principles of Dynamics that govern such a magnificent creation. Just stand there in silent admiration and remained stunned into silence. It makes targeting you for eradication so much simpler.

Now then… Stand still while my Golem’s non-existent weapon systems lock on and obliterate your tiny uncomprehending mind…

Jigain.8231:

Drakkon.4782:

redslion.9675:

Curunen.8729:

redslion.9675:

Curunen.8729:

Even in spvp other races don’t respect us, often going out of their way to insult us.
But asura always respect each other, even if they’re on the opposite team.

I think asuras are rally cute in spvp.
They fit EXACTLY under my hammer.XD

You’re a nasty person.
:p

Well, I found out Asuras are not so smart when their brains are spilled on the wall.XD

Is anyone reconsidering my plan to eliminate the bookah threat now? Yes? Good. Mother always said my ideas were ahead of their time. True genius is never respected in its time.

Threat? Don’t make me laugh.

Riddle me this – what’s more threatening than a bookah with a hammer?

…

…

…

Anything. Because that might actually hit you.

Remember: it’s the enemy who has to walk into your hammer, not the opposite.

redslion.9675:

Drakkon.4782:

redslion.9675:

Curunen.8729:

redslion.9675:

Curunen.8729:

Even in spvp other races don’t respect us, often going out of their way to insult us.
But asura always respect each other, even if they’re on the opposite team.

I think asuras are rally cute in spvp.
They fit EXACTLY under my hammer.XD

You’re a nasty person.
:p

Well, I found out Asuras are not so smart when their brains are spilled on the wall.XD

Is anyone reconsidering my plan to eliminate the bookah threat now? Yes? Good. Mother always said my ideas were ahead of their time. True genius is never respected in its time.

Well, you can’t conquer the norns. They live in cold places. You are cold blooded reptiles. You’d be wiped out by just walking into their territory.

Same with the steppes around the citadel: no sweat system means your organs will melt.XD

Differently from you, Charrs at least equip their machines with WEAPONS.XD

Not like your golems.

One word “science”

And the charr, so far they are capable of defeating weak creatures, as proven in the past.

^Exactly.

Environmental hazards are mere trivialities. Cold? Heat? Pah, child’s play.

Well, you’ll have to get out of your machines to eat sometimes.XD

And… well, make sure you work on your tracking system. Hitting a big, stunned dragon is one thing. Hitting an enemy who knows what he is doing is another.

However, you let a walkin cabbage order you around. Pretty humiliating.XD

^Everyone has to let the walking cabbage order them around – no special treatment for us!

Well, whatever. A war between races would be cool though.

It probably would be between Asuras and Charrs, right? They are the ones looking like empires.

Higher technology vs Lower technology, but made by people who know how to kill. (Charrs don’t have high technology compared to the Asura, but they know better than them how to make things work best with what they have).

That would be interesting.

redslion.9675:

Well, whatever. A war between races would be cool though.
It probably would be between Asuras and Charrs, right? They are the ones looking like empires.
Higher technology vs Lower technology, but made by people who know how to kill. (Charrs don’t have high technology compared to the Asura, but they know better than them how to make things work best with what they have).
That would be interesting.

Actually, technologically speaking, the lowest tech race are the Norn. That’s followed by the Humans, then the Sylvari, then the Charr and finally we Asura. Despite being lumbering dullards, the Charr are fantastic Engineers. The only difference between their technology and ours is a gross lack of finesse and style. Their technology looks, acts, and, sadly, is almost completely functional, instead of being polished and complete like a proper Asuran gizmo.

Humans and Norn are simply practical engineers. They meet whatever goal they need and stop innovating. They have no drive, nor passion, for invention, and no soul for innovating. They simply overcome whatever problem they have and then stop, until they find another problem. Rinse, repeat, as they say.

I place the Sylvari in the middle because their technology is organic, living. I have not found time in my busy schedule of dealing with the Dragon problem to investigate their technology, nor it’s source, the Pale Tree. I’m certain if I could run a few non-invasive tests on her I would be able to unlock the mechanics behind her biological technology, and then I could replicate it under controlled conditions.

…

INSPIRATION! The Heartwood are biological Golems! I’ll have to capture one, or at least large enough pieces of one and get them back into my lab. Just imagine and entire forest of living golems to fight the Dragons. I’m going to be so famous people will forget about Snaff!

Reborn.9862:

It seems no one respects us, I mean we’re awesome little geniuses.

Those who live without respect for the Asura, quite simply, do not live for very long.

redslion.9675:

Well, you’ll have to get out of your machines to eat sometimes.XD

Silly Bookah, everyone knows that we can easily install the Foodprep3000.1 which processes and prepares external foods and feeds the inner Asura.
Everything is possible… if an Asura wants it

You are right, basically every ausra NPC doesnt respect me as a norn, so why should I really feel obligated to be nice to asura in return?

Phate.4871:

You are right, basically every ausra NPC doesnt respect me as a norn, so why should I really feel obligated to be nice to asura in return?

What an unfortunate oversight! How rude of us. Please, enjoy this chilled beverage…

As a diplomat in high standing with Her Majesty, Queen Jennah of Kryta, I find it works best to attempt a compromise with two warring/disagreeing factions. To better understand your kind (and thus promote better relations with asura in the future), I have discovered an interesting quirk which can be summed up in the following statement:

Due to the fact that you are rather vertically-challenged, you feel more threatened by the taller races and thus wish to defend yourselves or otherwise prove yourself superior. This inner drive causes you to construct items of great firepower and technical artistry, such as the ever-popular Genius-Operated Living Enchanted Manifestations, or GOLEMs. If you feel snubbed by another, you tend to, instead of politely pointing out the object or phrase of your irritation, demand respect. This will produce an effect opposite from the one desired- think of it as reverse psychology. Thus, the more you demand, the less you get.

I once witnessed a fight between an intoxicated asura and a norn, in which the former was boasting of his superiority to the latter. The norn eventually became tired of his companion’s chatter, and when he refused to stop speaking, he promptly picked up the fellow in one hand and sent him flying with a punch from the other.

In the same way, earning the respect of your bookah companions will undoubtedly be more fruitful (and less painful) than trying to convince them that you are unquestionably worthy of their respect.

As a friend of mine once stated, “The more you claim you’re tough, the less people are going to believe it, and one day, someone’s going to get punched.”

May your theories always be sound,

~Selana Firestone

Selana Firestone.6389:

As a diplomat in high standing with Her Majesty, Queen Jennah of Kryta, I find it works best to attempt a compromise with two warring/disagreeing factions.
~Selana Firestone

Goodness, such distinguished company among us. Has anyone filled your wine glass, yet?

Drakkon.4782:

I have not found time in my busy schedule of dealing with the Dragon problem to investigate their technology, nor it’s source, the Pale Tree. I’m certain if I could run a few non-invasive tests on her I would be able to unlock the mechanics behind her biological technology, and then I could replicate it under controlled conditions.

Yeah, that won’t be happening.

The asura nearly gained the sylvari as an enemy due to such forays. Malomedies’ tale is a heavy and recent one. The physical and emotional wounds are fresh.

They’ve forgiven your people as a whole, but many have not forgotten.

It was the Pale Tree that spoke to her children to forgive your people regarding this, when several had sentiments of revenge.

You would then given recent history, consider experimentation on the mother of their race?

The same one that stayed the hands of her children against you? I… wouldn’t pursue that avenue if I were you. Non-invasive or not, it’s not a good idea.

From a common sense standpoint, I know many more asura with superior morallity then I do ones determined to be reprobates.

Let’s flip the situation. Would you consent to experimentation on your mother?

Moreover, would you consent to experimentation on your mother from someone with a bad record?

If the asura are determined to maintain their friendly neutrality with everyone, you have a fine line to walk there if not especially with regards to the sylvari.