Guild Wars 2

“More dazed soldiers staggering around in their Skivvies. Either we’re on the right track, or we missed the best party ever!” Rytlock Brimstone in Blood legion Charr storyline mission “Rage suppression”

The best one I’ve heard yet is in the Grove at the Asura gate where a Sylvari female and Asuran male are standing guard.

Sylvari: Your golem is strange. Was strange.
Asura: You drove it away, you know. I’ve never seen a golem run that fast.
Sylvari: I just wanted to ask it a few questions.
Asura: Yeah I know. You guys are full of them.
Sylvari: Oh, yes. What’s it like to be a golem? Does it dream? Does it have a family?
Asura: That was the last straw, you know. After that question about turtles in the desert you asked it about its mother.
Sylvari: So?
Asura: It doesn’t have a mother. It’s a golem. You crossed its circuits. I don’t know how you did it, but you weirded out my golem.
Sylvari: So, you are the mother? Or the father?
Asura: What? Well, I… I guess I .. Oh no. You’re not getting in my head. You just stand there and help me monitor the gate.
Asura (to himself): Am I the mother? Blazing braces, this is what I get for working with the tree children.

The amount of sass in his voice is PERFECT. I love hearing this one over and over again.

" ohhh by dwaynas hand,( moaning) and the view looks great " ,, hmm sublimimal sexual undertones , ? ya think

“I love it when you talk dirt”

Human: Say where’s the outhouse?
Asura: We don’t have outhouses, we have waterclosets.
Human: Like latrines?
Asura: No, they all flow into the same sewer system and that all goes out to sea.
Human: That’s more than I needed to know.
Asura: Hey you asked, just don’t ask me if anything lives down there.
Human: You got a deal.

Asura PC: “You’re dumb. You’ll die, and you’ll leave a dumb corpse.”

I had jumped of a cliff and landed near a green npc. When I land I lost half my health.

The npc said “ouch, that had to hurt”

Made me pause and laugh….

I just had to revive this old thread, I didn’t want to create another.

I was just hanging out in Divinity’s Reach when I heard an npc shout this:

“Look, it’s shiro tagachi!”
I had the same reaction as his npc friend, lol.

I like these nods to GW1. I rather enjoyed Factions, it was the only campaign I ever finished.

I heard one line last week when lifting a boulder that I’ve never heard before on my asura.

“Must. Lift. With. Legs”

Since then I’ve heard it again when lifting a water bucket.

Completing a skill point challenge today I overheard two of the npcs guarding the Dominion of Winds have multiple conversations that actually made me laugh out loud.

Hayato to Caromi Scout:
Hayoto: “Do you ever wish for something – a horde of undead or a wave of Krait – just to break the monotony?”
Scout: “Have you ever faced a wave of Krait or a horde of undead?”
Hayato: “No.”
Scout: *Long pause… “Learn to savor the monotony.”

Hayoto: “Here’s an idea – Let’s knock on these humungous steel doors – then hide and see what they do when they notice no one is there!”
Scout: Please don’t talk to me for the remainder of the shift.