Guild Wars 2

Dear ArenaNet,

You have given us, the players, many a-wonderfully designed sets and stuff and yet, we still crave more. How dare we, the ungrateful, ask more from your benevolence?

Our audacity knows no bounds. Here’s how: You have given us the Cook’s Outfit. And you have given us a pan that acts as the costume brawl. That’s well and good. But! May I suggest you take a step, nay, ten steps further?

Give us what we really want: cooking utensils to be used as fighting weapons!

Just imagine a mob of Hero-Chefs, wading through the battlefield clad in woks as shields, rolling pins as maces, giant Ginsu knives as 2H swords, and pitchers of water as focuses. Just -- Just imagine it, okay? Done? Good. Isn’t that a beautiful sight to behold? Not only that, it lets us stand around the cooking station in style. We’ll even look the part, too!

You have an unlimited amount of opportunity to milk us dry, O ArenaNet. You have the power to render us bankrupt in ten seconds flat (as a student, I find this strongly true). So why don’t you do that? Give us what we really want. Do the right thing.

Sincerely,
A Very Passionate Cook (Both in-game and out)

EDIT: Another thought just occurred. How do you sell products that matter the most? You get people to endorse them, of course!

Here’s what I’m thinking: We can have the Epic-Orrians run a campaign blitz about the viability of these utensil weapons. We’ll workshop the branding later. We can sell it to the public, but most importantly to the heroes, that it’s a 2-in-1 thing—It lets them cook stuff that they’ve just slaughtered with!

Just imagine them sitting around that bonfire buff (that people really hardly use, in all honesty) and have them whip out their utensil-weapons and cook their roadkill on the spot! Now isn’t that a great idea?