Guild Wars 2

MANDATORY MARTYRDOM:
Instant/channeled: Read a scroll and destroy your entire kingdom in the blink of an eye. If you manage to channel it for the full duration, slam your weapon into the floor and bring your entire kingdom back as undead monstrosities, to suffer eternally.

WHINE:
Instant, shout: JENNNNNAAAAAAAAA

Malchor’s Whine:
Instant, shout: DWWWAAAYNNNAAAAA

Guilt Trip
Channeled: For next 250 seconds, every charr in the area blames his failures on you. If there was any charr in 900 range before you 1000 seconds ago, you get knocked back and weakened.

Daemer.1605:

MANDATORY MARTYRDOM:
Instant/channeled: Read a scroll and destroy your entire kingdom in the blink of an eye. If you manage to channel it for the full duration, slam your weapon into the floor and bring your entire kingdom back as undead monstrosities, to suffer eternally.

WHINE:
Instant, shout: JENNNNNAAAAAAAAA

Can I use the first one against my people in WvW :O~!

Cause honestly they be more useful to me as mindless ghost than as headless chickens !!!

Abandon Team
Instantly teleport two zones away from the nearest foe. The most likeable member of your party dies after three seconds. Removes all immobilizes, slows, and sympathy. Chain effect. Leads into…

Fail
Fail spectacularly. All nearby allies die. Removes all conditions and cements hatred of you. Allows a free weapon swap. Chain skill. Leads into…

Justify
Make up some reason for why what you just did wasn’t totally stupid. Applies confusion to all nearby units.

Love the way this is just trolling Logan :P

Some WvWvW rage skills:

“kitten it!” – You teleport to Divinity’s Reach. Everybody else is stuck in WvWvW getting spawn camped for eternity. Enemy team gets 20 catapults for free. (2 days cooldown/instant cast)

“Gah! You dumb kittens!” – You get a new skill bar that allows you to control your team in WvWvW, making them your puppets. (5 secs cast/lasts for 10 mins/cooldown 1h)

Illusions of Safety – Teammates that ran away from the battle get transported to the center of the enemy party and suffer weakness forever. You teleport to safety. (instant)

“Can’t touch this!” – If you’re wearing light armor, grants immunity+stability for 1min. You start dancing and every enemy that touches you gets knocked back.

Rurik Mode
Run ahead and aggro all the things in a hotheaded rage, leading to your party fail their objective and refuse to res. Whilst active your aggro range is increased 100% and even passive mobs will want a piece.

Take one for the team
Run into battle without any backup and die from a sudden random avalanche caused by a dwarf riding a drake. There’s no real good reason why you’re there without backup, but the avalanche will confuse and stun your enemies enough for your team to run away to safety in Kryta.

Kormir’s Sacrifice
Teleport to a downed enemy and absorb their powers, enabling the person who actually killed it to qq for the rest of eternity about how you stole their godhood.

runeblade.7514:

Malchor’s Whine:
Instant, shout: DWWWAAAYNNNAAAAA

Can only be used when leaping off a high cliff killing yourself.

Essarious Quw.8946:

Rurik Mode
Run ahead and aggro all the things in a hotheaded rage, leading to your party fail their objective and refuse to res. Whilst active your aggro range is increased 100% and even passive mobs will want a piece.

This should be a shout:
“As a boy I spent much times in these lands…”

Knock
Knocks down target foe and opens nearby doors (including keep gates). Cast time: 12000 seconds.

Bald was Togo

Carry the ashes of Togo. While you carry his ashes all foes striking you in combat are blinded, dazed and confused. When you drop his ashes all creatures within 3000 range becomes hostile to you.

Reversed deus ex machina
Unexplainedly lose all of your health, endurance and land to a random nearby race to promote these for the upcoming sequel. All your good deeds will be credited to someone else and all bad deeds in 10^99999999999999999999999999999 range will be credited to you. Lose all gods, heroes, scientific advancements and only redeeming factors. Become bland to further ensure that no one picks you except for aesthetic reasons. Grants you the Loser boon for eternity and removes all your influence over the game. Should you against all odds retain a personality other than being a dumb, incompetent, whiny, tradition bound, spiritless person with the charm and charisma of trehearne, imediately transform into a Charr or Asura for the rest of the game.

^funny enough i would still take them over avatar of melandru and reaper of grenth without the blink of an eye.

Thank you (ch)ar(r )enanet by the way.