Guild Wars 2

Hi guys! What kind of EPIC and fun CONTENT do you guys think ArenaNet will GIFT us with in season 2 of the Living World? :DDDDDD

I would like to show my FULL predictions for the exciting MONTHS ahead:

SEASON 2: SCARLET RETURNS!

By POPULAR demand… She’s BAAAAAAACK! Not even death ITSELF is enough to stop Scarlet! She now returns as QUEEN of the Underworld, ready to once AGAIN stomp through all of Tyria!

Release 01: multiple PORTALS to the Underworld begin appearing all over the map. Players have to interact and do the FINISHER animation on them (but remember, due to how STOMPING works, only one player gets credit for each portal finished! Get stomping!). Meanwhile, an EPIC blog post on the Guild Wars 2 website explains how Scarlet took CONTROL of the Underworld and is not using the former god MENZIES as her trusted minion. Using a Finisher on 1.000 portals is enough to finish this release’s ACHIEVEMENT, which gives part 1 of the MYSTERIOUS Treasure, a fun and exciting reward for those who follow the entire season! :D

Release 02: two months later, because ArenaNet needs TIME to make content THIS exciting! Marjorie, Kasmeer, Rox, Braham and Taimi make a plan to ENTER the Underworld and bring the FIGHT to Scarlet! Meanwhile, the portals CONTINUE to grow and now they’re spilling HORDES of shades and ataaxes! Every 15 to 30 minutes, Scarlet’s LAUGHTER is heard in all maps across the ENTIRE game. Every two hours, a RANDOM map is filled with MORE portals, and players need to hurry to close them all within the time LIMIT – but hurry, because time is SHORT! Plus, the longer people stay in a portal, the HARDER the enemies that will appear from it, so those who stay too long would find themselves against LOTS and LOTS of CHAMPIONS D: D: D: Successfully defending against 100 invasions finishes this RELEASES’ achievement, giving part 2 of the epic and exciting Mysterious TREASURE!

Release 03: for the NEXT two months, Marjorie and friends ENTER the Underworld! The player CHARACTERS stay behind to deal with the mess, and what a mess it IS! Portals through all of TYRIA begin spilling debris, because the WORLD map needs more RUBBLE! Characters have to defeat all foes at every incursion point and perform CLEANING animations, but the RUBBLE won’t completely go away – this is an EXCITING entirely new and PERMANENT content to the game!!! Meanwhile, a new GREAT blog post in the Guild Wars 2 website will describe Marjorie and friends’ adventures through the alien and beautiful LANDSCAPE of the Underworld! Performing the cleaning JUST ten thousand times will unlock the achievement and grant the next treasure PART!

Release 04: the SHADOW Behemoth RISES! For this release, the Shadow Behemoth will be UPDATED to become a REAL challenge for REAL men DDDDD: 10 times more EPIC, 1.000 times more healthy POINTS, 100.000 times more FUN! The boss’ health will be dramatically increased, and players will be expected to capture portals across the entirety of Queensdale in order to be able to make the Behemoth VULNERABLE to damage. With at least 20 portals per map and the requirement for at least FIVE players to stay within the capture rings SIMULTANEOUSLY, this will guarantee fun for at least A HUNDRED guild members! But remember, by the time you run from the portals to the Behemoth it will be invulnerable again, so better get a few more FRIENDS there! Those who actually manage to DAMAGE the Shadow Behemoth will have a chance to get ASCENDED items reskins; doing it 100 TIMES will finish this release’s achievement and give the SECOND to LAST Mysterious Treasure fragment! Almost there!

Release 05: SHOCKING NEWS! Marjorie and friends returns from the Underworld saying that Scarlet is actually one of the GOOD GUYS DDDDD: The sleeping dragons are eating MAGIC, so they have to be awakened in order to be DEFEATED and save the WORLD (previous lore saying otherwise was SIMPLY wrong!). Players have to defend a HUGE ritual CIRCLE in the Gendaran Fields as Marjorie summons SCARLET back to TYRIA! Meanwhile, MALCONTENT citizens will foolishly try to stop the ritual, and they have to be put down by the player characters! Those citizens says thing like “We have Scarlet!”, “The ectos are dropping less often!” and “We want MATCH-UP topics!”, because META humor is so much FUN! After doing this 50 times, the ACHIEVEMENT will be unlocked, the LAST part of the MYSTERIOUS Treasure will be AWARDED! And, even better, SCARLET will finally return to the land of the living, radiating all the POWER and GRACE of a GOD! But the fight will have PERMANENT consequences! In the following explosion of mystical energies, our characters will be hurt and become PERMANENTLY mute! This is a NEW development that will continue in Guild Wars 2 FOREVER!

Release 06: Aftermatch, in which Lion’s Arch is rebuilt, with a STATUE of Scarlet replacing the Lion’s Fountain! Every NPC in the game has its dialogue changed to praise Scarlet! Unfortunately this means voice acting has to go, since no one REASONABLE could expect ArenaNet to record so many audio lines, right? But it’s a SMALL price to pay anyway. Scarlet joins Marjorie’s group (didn’t you guys notice the group was MISSING a Sylvari? This is WHY, people!) and they will become a new band of adventures called FATE’s EDGE! Scarlet and her new friends will go ADVENTURE to the far west, in order to defeat the dragon there! Meanwhile, our characters NOD silently and stay back to deal with the mess back in good old Kryta! PLUS – the Mysterious Treasure finally UNLOCKED! Those who managed to get all FIVE pieces will unlock an EXCLUSIVE Scarlet Backpack, allowing players to PROUDLY display the hero of Tyria’s face in their backs (for the so VERY small cost of a single TRANSMUTATION charge!)!!!!!!

This is the KIND of exciting and EPIC content I expect in the following months! What about YOU guys, aren’t you EXCITED about Season 2 too? :DDDDDDDDDDDDD

10/10 would read again

This is just … epic. ANet should fire all writers and replace them by you, OP!

Was expecting a writing where scarlet cooks someone up this time (just like she cooked Lord Faren)

Tom Hanks will express my thoughts for me.

laughing, tears in eyes.. still don’t know if this is satire or early content leak

Teste for Writer’s guild @ A-Net for sure thumbs waaay yup!

Awesome post!

Still better than what we got in Season 1.

this thread deserves 1000 healthy points

i’m just waiting for an expansion with an elder dragon to be released then anet suprises us with something like ‘scarlets sister maroon already killed the elder dragon and now you must suffer through multiple hideously boring LS’s until she’s defeated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!’

I read this in the style of William Shatner. I didn’t have to; it was funny enough on its own. But any excuse to bring on the Shat!

Also, you disturb me, OP, with what could indeed be uncanny foresight.

Oof.

As toxic and bitter as this is, it was funny.

No knowz if 2 LOL or 2 FLAAAAME.

Ohh lawwwd xD

+1

This is exactly how I saw the LS1. Unfortunately, it was supposed to be serious on anet’s part.

@ the OP:

You, good sir/madam have won the internets for at least a week!

Sylvari don’t have souls. Thread debunked.

Wait. They don’t? Also, no. Scarlet’s dead, she can stay dead.

(In all seriousness though, what evidence suggests Sylvari don’t have souls?)

We have not seen a single sylvari soul, even when we hear about sylvari who’ve died. The sylvari themselves don’t even know what happens when they die, unlike all other races who know with certainty that their souls move onto the Mists if they don’t have lingering issues. Some sylvari believe they too go to the Mists, others think they return to the Dream and will be reborn. But no one knows for certain. And even with insane sylvari dying, not one exists in the Mad Realm (which is basically the asylum of the afterlife for all races).

Even with only 23 years prior to GW2’s release timeframe, lacking the knowledge of where souls go when so many died, both firstborn (Riannoc) and secondborn included, is a massive oddity, which heavily implies – though, I will note, not confirm – that sylvari lack souls.

Basically it is a case of “lack of evidence is serving as the evidence of lacking.”

Hmm. Good point. That makes me a bit sad though.

Still, that does make me wonder why some of the Inquest in Mount Malestrom (one of them anyway) wanted to make sylvari soul generators. You’d think they’d have questioned if sylvari even have souls at all beforehand. Then again, they are just evil.

Still, this does beg another question: What of the dwarves, or the other non-playable races, (skritt, grawl, quaggan, dredge, jotun, krait, etc) does this imply that they don’t have souls either? While some of those races show up in fractals, they don’t seem to have ghosts either as far as I can tell, with the exception of the jotun (one ghost being in the worship stone in Osenfold Shear, and others lingering at two skill points around Dredgehaunt Cliffs, although this may be a remnant of their former magical knowledge.)

Sigh..all so confusing. Still, your point holds. Until we see a sylvari spirit or Seiran cherrying on through the Mists, it is possible that sylvari don’t have souls.

I think I have had enough Scarlet…. may she remain dead. They can have her in a flashback without her lame laugh if they want to flesh out the character more than the skeleton it was. But other than that no thanks.

CptAurellian.9537:

This is just … epic. ANet should fire all writers and replace them by you, OP!

Why, did you notice a difference in story & character quality?

I’m sure the Writers wanted Scarlet to become a god & delete Menzies, Dhuum & everything else in GW1 & make the whole story focus around Sylvari.

My face hurts from laughing xD

I just uninstalled.

Fury.6281:

I just uninstalled.

And we should care? Your choice, no one cares. Play Mario.
@Very good story, would be nice to see such a story in game.