Guild Wars 2

There were banquet tables, little cog thingie icons, I pressed “F” (repeatedly) for “Food Fight”, my skills stayed the same, I flailed around with my melee, got knocked on my butt and other players got crowns.

There must be something I’m missing. :/ How does one engage in a Food Fight?

Generally people do that to trick clueless players into custom brawl and get easy champion. Mad King food table and pirate cannon are both like that. Since only those who has transformation tonic could go in and out of custom brawl, people would put those things down and wait for others to come and play with them. Once a player touches it, he or she enters custom brawl. A player without a tonic cannot leave the brawl and cannot fight back, so he or she can only be slaughtered by the player who put it down. Your only option here is to waypoint out of there.

Generally you hit F at the table when other brawlers are near. Maybe you have to hit it first? If you see a cloud of BAM POW around you, you did it right.