Youre not a ranger if ....
- You’ve shot knock back shot trying to hit the warrior directly in front of you but instead have someone behind you targeted and put the skill on CD.
- You’ve used a support F2 and forgot your pet thought that was his cue to run into the middle of the enemy zerg.
As their mother, I have to grant them their wish. – Forever Fyonna
- You get kicked from a PUG immediately upon joining.
This one is recent:
- being asked if you’re a bearbow in a pug when you have on sword/axe and jungle stalker
-You’ve been asked, more than you care to count.-
“Why are you playing a Ranger?”
“Can you bring any other class besides Ranger?”
-Danced on the corpse of a foe because they just lost to a power ranger who didn’t even slot EB. They’re playing was bad and they should feel bad.-
- You’ve never thrown yourself off a cliff with one of those skills that make you jump backward (S2, SB3, LR) (promised: I learned my lesson, and don’t fire them blindly no more :P)
- Used your Wolf’s F2 only to have it do nothing and instead continue hitting the guy about to stomp you.
- Used your Raven’s F2 to finish off opponent and instead it deciding to cast swiftness even though you already have 20+ second of it.
-Wondered why you have no true condition application weapon without some extra circumstances tied to your AA like every other class does.
- you have made some ridiculous op suggestion as what balance change the ranger class needs.
- left you pet on passive and wondered why that camp took so long to flip.
- pet rezed under water with 2+ people attacking you.
- died to retaliation from barraging a zerg pvd’ing a gate
– picked up a heap of bags at spawn after doing the above.
- calmed my zerker barebow build works in wvw.
- calmed that the shortbow is a condition only weapon
- suggested the maul should be a blast finisher.
i could do this all day
- You had good self-esteem up until you entered an explorable dungeon or decided to try WvW.
- You’ve shot at someone with a bow in WvW and had an existential crisis immediately after.
- You’ve felt forced to decide between being a “tank with a butter knife” or a “glass salesman with a scalpel”.
- You’ve had to develop psychic powers in order to successfully dodge when using a sword.
- Your acrophobia flares only when you have a sword equipped.
- You’ve associated most patches with weeping and gnashing of teeth.
- You’ve developed a godlike tolerance for pain after one and a half years of the aforementioned patches.
- You’ve screamed such things at your pets/monitors:
“Stop! STOP! Come back! NOOO!!!” /party “I’m sorry guys, we have incoming.”
“Attack! Stop wagging your tail and attack! ATTACK!!!”
“Stop fluttering around and attack! Today!”
“Lick my wounds! LICK THEM! No, don’t just stare at me!”
“He’s telegraphing a huge attack! Come back! Withdraw! Retreat! Run— nevermind, just limp back like you are.”
Made a norn female ranger so she could be Eir wannabe
- used the sword #3 skill to evade/re-position on a mob and wound up behind a rock or tree instead.
- used the F2 on a snow leopard and watched it leap wonderfully into empty space, then stop and look back at you.
- watch your passive pet’s health bar disappear in seconds under a barrage of AoE
If you haven’t complained about how terrible the 1h sword auto attack is to later master this weapon and found out how great it really is.
everyone should fear becoming mentally clouded and obsessed with one small section of truth.
When you decide to save your pet, use your heal and 5 seconds later you die because you cant heal yourself.
Your pet cant reach the target
Your pet dies instantly, you swap and other pet dies too
Just the WvW
R3200+
- I named my Siamoth “Skin N Bones”, My Brown Bear “Diet Mentor” – Im Being Realistic
- Looking at my traits and do wonder why they are all over the place but still managed to make a stable build
- Proud to be hated in my case is more like a necro/mesmer
- Never actually put my pet on any other option (only passive) and being nice by once in awhile letting it attack something
- Going WvW more than dungeons so… fights? aggro something? sure.. thats why i went there…
- I hate my sword AA aswell but never made me fall off cliffs
- My Pet kinda saves me sometimes so i think it deserves a hug more than a slap
P.S : I randomly putted the points and not by your order just cause i can.
(no sarcasm or offensive intention intended)
Don’t worry Your post made me smile.
- Used signets in a big WvW fight without traiting them, thinking they would save your life.
- Get super fired up every time a thief is killed by your hand and your hand alone.
- Scratch your head and get super confused whenever you need to figure out a new build.
- Wonder why pet controls aren’t more intuitive.
- Throw your hands up in the air when you die due to sword 1 auto attack.
- Feel a sense of adventure because you have a pet running next to you.
- Enjoy that moment when you are down but your spirit of nature revives you on the spot, revenge is sweet.
- Fail to understand why everyone dislikes rangers, even after you have worked out a serious build and managed to be the #1 most competitive player in your guild.
- Have had a whole bunch of thieves hunt you and you alone down in the middle of a zerg fight in WvW.
Ranger’s guide to PvP/WvW: http://tinyurl.com/oht3e9z
- when you hit signet of stone and it does not work as “you” intended. Then Rage at the new bug, and in the middle of your rant realize you forgot to grandmaster trait; Signet of Beast Master, so that your signets will affect you.
- Find yourself screaming at your pet for blocking your camera angle after taking damage while jumping to the next position in a jump puzzle.
- feel guilty but justified when you name your pets D O A and K I A
- cried when the leaked patch notes for rangers were denounced as fake
- you have face palmed at lease once per page in the CDI.
- you stick with playing ranger, through thick and thing
- you still say to your self next patch.
- you look at the enlargement trait try to think up a build where you could use it, but give up.
- you see Eotm as an opportunity to use a longbow
- you get sick of visiting the training guy to reset you traits
- you have leveled most other professions to 80 and still find your self loging on to your ranger, and you can’t explain to your guilds mates why.
i told one of my guilds commanders last night that i only have mez and engi to go and he could not under stand why i still bring a ranger to raids.
-when your 3 buddy’s that you know, invite you knowing your a ranger, and the 4th pug guy goes, “Lol! ranger?!”, at the start of a dungeon run.
-In WvW, standing on a wall spamming your superior ac down on the zerg below you, only to have the ac disappear (health = 0) just as you press the 3 key… and you happen to have your Greatsword equipped!
Yes, you do fly serenely out into the middle of the zerg, and the zerg pauses to laugh at you!…..
- You’ve never thrown yourself off a cliff with one of those skills that make you jump backward (S2, SB3, LR) (promised: I learned my lesson, and don’t fire them blindly no more :P)
I’ve killed myself both ways with sword (jumping forward and jumping backward).
You’re not a ranger if you haven’t:
- gotten low on hp and started to run away, swapped to GS to escape, hit Swoop, only to realize you forgot to clear the target you were trying to Swoop away from.
- wondered why you’re doing so little damage against a target at melee range, then notice you have longbow equipped instead of sword.
- hit Lighting Reflexes and gotten confused when nothing happens, then you realize you’re immobilized.
- hit Hunter’s Call only to see others kill the mob before it finishes activating.
- been the only survivor of a would-be party wipe because your pet managed to revive you.
- (for those who played before the pet non-aggro patch) wondered “where the h#@$ did my pet go?”, hit F3, and saw your pet returning with a dozen mobs in tow.
- turned off autotarget because you got sick of your pet attacking the nearest mob every time you hit horn 5 for swiftness.
- cursed because you had to move (red circle, mob preparing big attack, etc) a second after you hit Barrage.
- double checked to make sure you created a new ranger when you’re given an axe.
- ended up fighting a half dozen neutral mobs because that axe bounce has a bigger range than you thought.
- done an epic facepalm when you learned that Sic Em is bugged, and the way you’ve been using it for the last 8 months – hit Sic Em, then F1 to order your pet to attack – causes the Sic Em buff to disappear.
- given up trying to name your pets.
(edited by Solandri.9640)
Constantly being chased in wvw/pvp by thiefs/warrs because they think youre a free kill (sometimes they are the free kills)
Managed to develop a deep hate for bearbows and the almost useles longbow (still somewhat good in skyhammer/eotm)
- you’ve never been kicked from a pug group you started (bad enough to be kicked from a random pug group… it’s really a slap when you are kicked out your own group)
Constantly being chased in wvw/pvp by thiefs/warrs because they think youre a free kill (sometimes they are the free kills)
Being attacked by warriors and thieves is one of my favorite parts of being a ranger… 9/10 they end up running (if they can).
alts: Fangyre (Necro), Hardrawk (Ele);
Jade Quarry
join the COE “expert only” pug, and ending soloing Alpha with s/h while the longbow war lies dead with the other 3 ppl at range…
-had a group follow you around because they realize that point blank is awesome in EotM near the edges. – Had a group lead the fights to the edge and set me up.
Using sword #3 to evade a telegraphed attack only to end up in front of the mob once again.
This entire thread gets a +1 from me
-if you never named your pet “Im with stupid”
-if you never tried to dodge through an enemy zerg with RaO only to realize you slotted Entangle
-if you never named your pet “Im with stupid”
-if you never tried to dodge through an enemy zerg with RaO only to realize you slotted Entangle
Bonus points if you’ve ever tried to dodge through a zerg with RaO on and still died from Immobilize.
-if you never tried to step on that single piece of rock where your projectile towards Veteran Archers are obstructed one step forward and out of range one step backward.
-if you order Lick Wounds under a meteorshower.
-if you didn’t 1v1 downed against an ele who moves a mile away and let the zerg finish you.
-if you never swapped out to a dead pet
“A man chooses; a slave obeys.” | “Want HardMode? Play Ranger!”
- If you play a GuildWars2 “Beastmaster” profession.
Want to play as real Ranger? Try Guild Wars 1.
- You had expectations of playing a viable archery profession.
- You have ever wondered how “throwing traps” actually works.
- You feel traits are useful.
Co-founder of Flying Pink Unicorns [PWNY], Ring of Fire
You’re not a Ranger if….
You haven’t been to these forums shedding Crocodile tears =)
Vol I – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J9klT6bLDew
Vol II – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mqgHkV327sM
You wonder why people still go longbow when you stack in a dungeon
Why does the bear seem to be a favorite
You shed laughing tears when you read the wvw topic Ranger pets are OP
(edited by theodor.3480)
You shed laughing tears when you read the wvw topid Ranger pets are OP
Oh, and this one too!
(howbearinwater)
-Wondered why you have no true condition application weapon without some extra circumstances tied to your AA like every other class does.
Never understood this one either.
How to beat a shortbow ranger? Run directly at him/her and calmly stab him/her to death.
I troll because I care
-In WvW, standing on a wall spamming your superior ac down on the zerg below you, only to have the ac disappear (health = 0) just as you press the 3 key… and you happen to have your Greatsword equipped!
Yes, you do fly serenely out into the middle of the zerg, and the zerg pauses to laugh at you!…..
Done this a dozen times at least.
I troll because I care
- Stealthed a boss (on accident or for kicks)
- Knocked back yourself
- Rapid Fired yourself (on cliffside, it hurts you way more than the boss in full zerk :p)
- Caused filler-pugs to instantly leave
- Spam #2 in down because it takes ages to pop, and then fly backwards as you rally.
You have five other alts maxed to 80 yet get tired of their mechanics and return to ranger for the agony and the ecstasy.
JQ Ranger
- You’ve never thrown yourself off a cliff with one of those skills that make you jump backward (S2, SB3, LR) (promised: I learned my lesson, and don’t fire them blindly no more :P)
I’ve killed myself both ways with sword (jumping forward and jumping backward).
You’re not a ranger if you haven’t:
- gotten low on hp and started to run away, swapped to GS to escape, hit Swoop, only to realize you forgot to clear the target you were trying to Swoop away from.
- wondered why you’re doing so little damage against a target at melee range, then notice you have longbow equipped instead of sword.
- hit Lighting Reflexes and gotten confused when nothing happens, then you realize you’re immobilized.
- hit Hunter’s Call only to see others kill the mob before it finishes activating.
- been the only survivor of a would-be party wipe because your pet managed to revive you.
- (for those who played before the pet non-aggro patch) wondered “where the h#@$ did my pet go?”, hit F3, and saw your pet returning with a dozen mobs in tow.
- turned off autotarget because you got sick of your pet attacking the nearest mob every time you hit horn 5 for swiftness.
- cursed because you had to move (red circle, mob preparing big attack, etc) a second after you hit Barrage.
- double checked to make sure you created a new ranger when you’re given an axe.
- ended up fighting a half dozen neutral mobs because that axe bounce has a bigger range than you thought.
- done an epic facepalm when you learned that Sic Em is bugged, and the way you’ve been using it for the last 8 months – hit Sic Em, then F1 to order your pet to attack – causes the Sic Em buff to disappear.
- given up trying to name your pets.
Get out of my head!!
- You and a another ranger are in a downed state rez-race and you lose because you swap AWAY from the wolf instead of to the wolf.
- You go for a stealth stomp and realize you have the guy behind you targeted.
- You fully escape from a dangerous situation and are 100% clear, then monarch’s leap back in.
(edited by Fluffball.8307)
If you’re backstabbing one……..Egads they’ve spotted me!! *flees out of subforum
You havent read this thread and totally agree with it all!
Madness Rises [Rise] – Banners Hold.
Don’t argue with idiots, they pull you down their level and own you with experience.
- You get kicked from a PUG immediately upon joining.
The devs never believe this one – I hope it gets to a thousand likes.
To the —→* gotten low on hp and started to run away, swapped to GS to escape, hit Swoop, only to realize you forgot to clear the target you were trying to Swoop away from.
I say I want an escape button that unselects enemies!
Escape/deselecting doesn’t work every time…
-In WvW, standing on a wall spamming your superior ac down on the zerg below you, only to have the ac disappear (health = 0) just as you press the 3 key… and you happen to have your Greatsword equipped!
Yes, you do fly serenely out into the middle of the zerg, and the zerg pauses to laugh at you!…..
Done this a dozen times at least.
Last night I was alone in a tower in WvW and exactly that happened, but it hadn’t happened in a while and I thought it had been fixed, so luckily for ME I didn’t move and waited until the UI cleared back to there being a tower and an AC under me.
Oh!The joys of the bugs in WvW!
- If you play a GuildWars2 “Beastmaster” profession.
Want to play as real Ranger? Try Guild Wars 1.
- You had expectations of playing a viable archery profession.
- You have ever wondered how “throwing traps” actually works.
- You feel traits are useful.
I feel your pain my friend, I feeeeeeeel your pain.
You have five other alts maxed to 80 yet get tired of their mechanics and return to ranger for the agony and the ecstasy.
I have exactly that – all 80s and I keep going back to my Ranger – the one I started on and the one I will leave on.
Do we grouse a bit about our state, especially compared to the glory of the Ranger of old? Yes.
Is that because we are angry?
Nope.
For me, and maybe for many, it’s because we cherish Ranger as we have from other games, we have more fun with this one character and will not shelve it no matter how frustrated we become with broken mechanics and lack of equity with our fellow mates in the fight for Tyria and for the Universe.
We fight with races who are just now becoming sentient – and we are the ones besides the Sylvari who will nurture these new friends in the fight against tyranny and evil.
Rangers are the natural healers, the natural friends of the forest creatures and with that I will hit the thing that hurts my feelings about my character most.
If I am a real Ranger why would I EVER TARGET A FELLOW CREATURE not bothering me?**
I should not be ABLE to hit an animal – they should all be green for Rangers unless they are malevolent.
Hitting a doe while taking a tower, for a Ranger, is so totally out of character that it breaks the immersion that all of us are looking for.
(edited by atheria.2837)
Constantly being chased in wvw/pvp by thiefs/warrs because they think youre a free kill (sometimes they are the free kills)
Being attacked by warriors and thieves is one of my favorite parts of being a ranger… 9/10 they end up running (if they can).
Wanna share that beast build? **
Felling proud when you get complimented by a group for being better than 90% of the bearbows (when running sword/x wisth spotter and all the kitten)