This community understands the power of forum tears. We all crave them (eventually) because it is so abundant and everflowing. Every time some out-of-keep afking new player gets ganked in wvw, they come on here and complain about a thief’s 200k eviscerate. That is the power that draws us in and coerces us into typing something that would likely lead to an infraction.
This is a burden on us to the point where we simply give into, and sometimes embrace, our inner flaming troll. Well I have a treat for you!
I call it Tearmancy.
The way it works is whenever someone dies and complains about thieves on any chat medium, they are inflicted with Tear stacks. These tears are generated depending on the profession and severity of ignorance on the thief profession and their own. Thieves use up the Tear stacks on these players to produce a variety of effects. I shall list a few of them:
Mark of Terra Badd (40 tears)
When a marked players dies, a sign is shown above their head in proportion to how outnumbered their enemy was. If the marked player kills a player while outnumbered in combat, they are immune to Mark of Terra Badd for 24 hours per player they have killed.
Ragequit Venom (100 tears)
Foes affected by Ragequit Venom that die will be immediately downed after waypointing by a summoned thief that will perform a Backstab and then dissappear. This will randomly occur once every 1-8 minutes . Venom effect lasts one hour. Unblockable.
Flame Bubble (25 tears)
Reflect any and all rage messages aimed at you directly back at the player. Messages generated are based on profession and are in the form of 1337speak. Messages are unignorable.
Duration: 1 minute
What are your ideas on this, thief forumites?