Guild Wars 2

Hello and welcome!

What I offer to you:

• A place to hang your hat in a hysterical friendly environment
• Assistance learning the WvW game mode and more advanced tactics for veteran players
• Warm welcome for all classes (Yes, I take Rangers and Thieves)
• No rep requirement (Encouraged when we do missions so you get the lewts)
• WvW scheduled raids twice a week (we are on every night anyway)
• PVE as a group for gear (Fractals or open world)
• Working towards raids
• Discord for voice and community (TC as a server uses Teamspeak, we will use that when joining other groups)
• Theme nights in WvW
• Lewd and lascivious humor
• Roaming, dueling, Zerg style, Havoc squads. We do it all.

What I’m looking for in recruits:

• People who value fun first while being competitive
• Being open to theory craft with the group and always improve
• Enjoy being part of a community that really is like a family
• Sarcasm
• Being on Tarnished Coast to join in our madness
• Active members of a guild who are interested in building from the ground up
• Players who enjoy a vast array of content and combat styles

If you have any further questions please let us know! Try us out for awhile and see what the insanity is all about.

Contact: Fatherbliss.4701 (Guild Lead and Chief Mischief Maker), MawbsteR.3890 (Officer and Lead of WvW), WTFLIN.6801 (Officer and PVE Raid Lead)

Website: http://goatsofthunder.enjin.com/.
Feel free to join the Discord to listen in to our banter or music bot: https://discord.gg/y7vbNSr

Additionally on a serious note:

While I am laid back and enjoy having fun I really enjoy winning. Plus I enjoy typing in guild chat too. This is the type of space where we talk about real life, discuss builds, collaborate on what else we need to do to unlock a spec. Come on in for some comraderie and entertainment!

Adults only please. Anyone masquerading as an adult in a child like way shall quickly be dealt with.

Likely by praise and a free Dye pack. Maybe a hat.

Looking for someone to be my Yak and carry my supplies. I’ll entertain with stories of days of yore, tall tales of WvW shenanigans and also poetic expression about open field siege.

how big is the guild

Evan.2758:

how big is the guild

Super small. Right now I have a few of my friends who have joined for fun and amusement. About six of us currently. We all have other main guilds with some crossover.

Still plenty of room. Plus tea and biscuits. We also supply very small yet dapper looking hats. Have to look fashionable on the field of battle.

You want to know what I find endearing and amazingly attractive? A partner in crime. I want people who will come up with absolutely positively the worst ideas, most insane builds and most outlandish concepts ever.

Then we will go do them. With enthusiasm. Probably some long ponderous looks into the moonlight too. After all, the best plan is always plan B. The one where we YOLO into the base.

Sometimes the best laid plans are those that involve not only yaks but also goats. Mostly goats. They are superior in every way.

Each night after raiding I will send one lucky guild mate whatever is in my bags. This could be a precursor, a centaur mini, an over sensitive player with a man bun, even the location of the coveted jar of bees. ANYTHING.

All players welcome including enemy servers. Because nothing is more amusing than a long courtship followed by an amazing death scene at the top of SMC complete with video capture and a soundtrack.

Ran out of people to talk to two days ago. Its rough out here. Oxygen low, growing food. I hope there is something to listen to soon besides disco.

Send help.

We have discussions about Metal most evenings. Why? Because it is awesome and embodies life as we know it and an urge to kill things with fire.

People fear my sloth backpack. It is known.

If I wasn’t based on Kaineng, I would probably hit ya up for an invite. But being on KN, no telling where we’ll be in another month or two.

Teon.5168:

If I wasn’t based on Kaineng, I would probably hit ya up for an invite. But being on KN, no telling where we’ll be in another month or two.

Yep, might as well wait. I was discussing this today with a friend about the servers. Right now people should see what happens before transferring or anything too. I’m liking Kaineng enough that one of my alts is going to magically appear there.

(You could always friend me in game so at least we can do PVP!)

Looking for in-game models to show off the sloth backpack while flanked by people in the fairy wings. For science.

I’ll never know what you are wearing if you don’t join my guild. Or if you want to cuddle. I mean, what will I do with all of this bacon? I can’t eat this by myself.

This is real talk people. REAL.

Who pets the cat? We pet the cat! Who crab walks to the precious ruin of doom? We do! Come join us for festivities on the borderlands along with a healthy dose of goat cheese.

Looking for a few brave souls to spread destruction, death and general mayhem on the battle field. Previous experience in killing without hesitation is a plus. Enjoying the sight of red all over the place in myriad patterns is also beneficial.

Come run with us. Enjoy the hunt.

We play naked on the weekends. Only the weak need to rely on “stats” and “armor” as a crutch.

I stumbled upon this to read out of curiosity and I just had to saw, I LOVE your sense of style with your posts! You have me intrigued.

Leap.2760:

I stumbled upon this to read out of curiosity and I just had to saw, I LOVE your sense of style with your posts! You have me intrigued.

Why thank you! I fully believe that humor is the best medicine for everything going on in the world. At least to soften the blows as we hopefully make some positive change. I also think there are way too many kitten trolls in gaming and I try to offer people a broad based goofy setting within which to succeed.

(TC is open right now…just saying.)

We are not just another guild that performs strange rituals on unsuspecting Humans with hummus and a taser late at night. No. We are the guild that attaches itself to your leg in a manner that implies cuteness and ends in ever increasing amounts of horror over time.

Plus it is known that chocolate chip cookies summon the devil in mass quantities. IT IS KNOWN.

Interested. PMed IG.

zdain.3192:

Interested. PMed IG.

Sounds good! I shall answer there.

We know how to properly throw a lightswitch rave. (When Strongbad is out of town is the correct answer.)

Leap.2760:

I stumbled upon this to read out of curiosity and I just had to saw, I LOVE your sense of style with your posts! You have me intrigued.

I saw that you added me Leap. We’ll get you sorted once I finally get back online. Power outage. Storm of the century. Zero pants.

If only there were a people with a certain sense of wonder, panache and interest in cucumbers. Because those people would be entranced by my attention to detail.

We like detail here. We still portal bomb. I put up siege on tiny boats just to confuse people. I’m going to knock the walls down on your keep and then RUN AWAY. We will attack your structures simultaneously. All of them.

If your name rhymes with grapefruit, please apply within.

Sausage patties. You want ’em? We got ’em.

The only thing better than bacon is going back retroactively in time and ensuring the your bacon ate bacon.

#Baconception

Right about now, the GOAT soul brother, check us out now, the WvW lover, right about now, we run without pants, join right friggin now, I thought those were raisins and they were ants.

That kinda works. Its amusing so I’ll keep it. Come and help me pick out my attire on a daily basis. If left to my own devices I’ll just wear plaids and camo mixed together.

Would you like to join a guild that works out together? One that does deep knee bends? A guild where we band together, wearing very short shorts, doing stretches in awkward positions just to pass the time?

This is the guild for you. I am your Exercise Dominator. Together we shall pump it up, slide it around and do that little dance.

Today we exercise our exclusive right to a toga party within the Ruins. Come join. Stay awhile. Dance with the enemy. Show them our flesh may be weak but by the Gods are weapons are strong.

Plus my bags are empty. Gotta fix that.

Looking for people named “Treats”, “Red Beans” or “Sausage.” Please leave a sample product in my in box for all of the guild mates to try. We shall accept your patronage with great glee.

I once accidentally applied Coconut Butter to my character instead of Lemongrass. Interesting enough I managed to slide by the enemy and right past the Lord, across the wall and died horribly in front of the main zerg.

True story.

We are BACK in business! This summer has been quite busy for our leadership team of one person. I have now taken the reigns (rains? Africa?) in an attempt to bridge peace with a notion of lotion. Or Frank Ocean. Regardless, you would be well advised to join us.

Last night I tagged up at the bottom of the lake next to Bay. Strange, that people continued to come up to me to see what the fuss is about. And we didn’t drown. Not one time! Imagine what would happen if we built siege that faced a tower!

Now offering free back rubs and summons to the ninth ring of cats where the donuts are stored.

Small group roaming, havok and dancing with Asura needed. Also, sPVP with the best of ‘em! I don’t know who those people are but when we find them you can run with them.

Softcore…roaming. Now with sweet sweet lovin’ before and after our raids. Compliments of the chef. Shady looking mofo in the background holding a machete. I’d be careful if I were you.

Want to PVP with scrubs who take way too long to even get out of bed in the morning? Come visit us. We have all of the bacon that you would ever want.

All ye who enter into this humble abode, dispense with pants and your loosely defined morals today.

Now with cake. You like cake don’t you? Of course you do. Who doesn’t like cake?

This is the most illustrious guild ever. It doesn’t actually exist. I have become a meta game all on my own. So why advertise something that does not exist? Simple. I see you out there on TC. Running. Always running. Let us run together in a united front of exhilaration and milk thistle tea.

I despise meta builds. I itch when I see meta guilds. I froth at the mouth after getting meta drilled.

Once, compatriots of mine would lay down and stare up at the sky in WvW together. Mostly because we got stomped. But after that, we realized the true beauty in the world. That came from sharing that unicorn coffee drink together. Because no one really needs that much sugar. EVER.

Don’t quite call this a comeback. But do stop by and allow me to rub you down after combat.

Loving the enthusiasm this week folks! Even if my guild does nothing more for you than give you a place to rest your weary head, talk among friends and offer a space to rant within, I feel I have done my duty. Just don’t ask about the pirate treasure or the asura den.

Now featuring some of the best club music available while raiding. Plus we automatically supply Juicy Fruit to all members who last longer than six months.

So far no one has received any candy. I think its the lack of morals.

Have you ever wanted to roleplay as a steampunk crew on board of an invisible dirgible, running about a scenario developed entirely through the use of a downloaded history book poorly translated for children? Now is your chance! Recruiting high octane players who ply their trade underneath bridges in the south, on top of houses in the north and automatically reject the notion of being ‘outnumbered’ as careless folly.

Looking for a new guild to get your feet wet in WvW? Want someone to show you the ropes? Never fear! The guild has just reformed and shall begin at the beginning. If you want to be part of something brand spanking new, in a thriving and vibrant community that looks an awful lot like jam after Tuesday leftovers, this is the place. This is the time. You are the people.

The best possible guild for you is likely only going to come once in a blue moon. The pale kind. That you drink. We are such a guild. This is such an invitation. You are the type of players I want.

Wearing only an apron.

Now featuring donuts and nightly mayhem on the borderlands of our choice! Which really amounts to whichever one we can get into. Right now we are role playing what it might be like to take down enemies, complete with the pew pew sounds.

One time, we gathered the Golems together and lined them up in an effort to summon their main deity. We got a toaster oven instead.

The crowd admittedly went wild.

Hey may I join?

atomic wolf.4701:

Hey may I join?

Of course! All are welcome into the Clan of the Goat people.

Now looking for the elusive players who like to WvW on builds that are entertaining, fun and super crazy to play.

Come for the sauce. Stay because I’m like the Boss. Just not as much denim.