“Good morning fellow Tyrians! Plyxi here and boy do I have a treat for you! Following his recent reveal as a supporting Legend in the new Guildwars 2: Heart of Thorns expansion, we were able to catch up with Shiro Tagachi to ask him a few questions about his return to the Guildwars universe.”
Plyxi: “Mr. Tagachi, I’d like to thank you for taking the time for this interview. Do you have any opening remarks for your Guildwars: Factions fans?”
At this point Shiro stood up and clenched his fists before taking a villainous pose.
Shiro: “I HAVE RETURNED!”
Plyxi: “Ahhh… ok, we sort of got that with the reveal. Anyway, is there any coffee or water that I can get you before we begin?”
Shiro: “What kind of food buff will this give me?”
Plyxi: “Ahh… healing power I believe.”
Shiro: “Disgusting!” He stands up and kicks over the table with the cups on it. A charr attendant comes over to move the broken table and mess off screen.
Plyxi: “Ok… that was unexpected. Mr. Tagachi. What can you tell us about your powers as a legend and it’s playstyle?”
Shiro: He ponders a moment and puts a hand to his chin “Well. Think of a warrior but with speed, teleports, and an aoe basilisk venom. Oh and you get awesome versions of my Shiro’ken blades made of jade that steal health. They aren’t as good as the real thing though.”
Plyxi: “So are you more or less satisfied with your skillbar loadout?”
Shiro: “I’m just disappointed that they didn’t use any of the original names for my skills. I mean come on! Battle Scars, Meditation of the Reaper, Against Impossible Odds… I put so much time into coming up with those cool names.” He sighs then shrugs “Well it could be worse. I suppose I didn’t get it as bad as those other legends.”
Plyxi: “Speaking of the other legends, what do you think about Jalis and Ventari?”
Shiro: He laughs. “Pathetic! I saw that Ventari guy on the way here in the bathroom. He slipped and slammed his head on one of the sinks. Poor guy couldn’t even heal himself because his tablet was stuck in the hallway. They had to call an ambulance. Jalis? I don’t know about him. I just saw him channeling his elite. I came back after lunch and he was still channeling.”
Plyxi: “Do you think you will have any synergy with the other legends?”
Shiro: “I don’t want to be caught dead paired up with those two. They better pair me up with Mallyx or Glint. Ahhh… Mallyx. I remember the good old days of us stomping newbies in the realm of torment… well until Ursanway came and ruined it all. I remember Mallyx being alot better in his prime though. Old Mallyx would have just facesmashed people instead of trying this condition mess. I keep telling him that power is the way to go. He’s as stubborn as that Lich. If the Lich was DPS specced during our last fight, we would have crushed those flameseeker heroes.”
Plyxi: “Are you looking forward to anything in the new Guildwars 2 expansion personally?”
Shiro: “Well I have replicas of my blades and armor lined up for sale in the Black Lion Gemstore. I’m sure I’ll have more gems than I know what to do with.”
Plyxi: “Any plans for those gems?”
Shiro: “I think I might use them to kickstart Shiroken University. It’s an online college with courses designed to teach young Quaggans how to properly spec into dps builds. My philosophy is that if you teach the younger generation the value of mass murder and damage early, you can make the world a better place.”
Plyxi: “I notice that you keep staring out the window, is there something wrong Mr. Tagachi?”
Shiro: “That idiot Revenant over there is heading into that fractal gate with cleric armor and a staff. I think we might need to cut this interview short. Someone needs to stop him. What is he trying to do? Trap his team in there for 5 hours?”
Shiro suddenly teleports to the revenant and bursts him into down state in 2 seconds. Some shouting can be heard.
“AND STAY DOWN THERE UNTIL YOU LEARN HOW TO REV!”
Plyxi: “Well there you go Tyrians! Shiro Tagachi, coming to a Revenant near you! Be sure to Preorder! I’ll see you next time, on Eye on Tyria!”
More screaming can be heard as Shiro begins to terrorize other staff Revenants.
(edited by lordhelmos.7623)