Guild Wars 2

Idk why but it always cracks me up when Modniir yells : “Come battle me, Two Legs” or whatever he says.

Two legs.

Oh, I’m hurt. I’m defeated. You have slain me with your magic vocabulary!

My favorite quote happens to fall in the insults category. I really enjoyed handing the replica Ho-Ho-Tron a copper and having it say, “That was literally the least you could do.”

You ran from a skrit.

“No one is arguing the need for a plan… It’s just that your plan is stupid and won’t work.”

I always start that dungeon off with a smile.

Nike.2631:

“No one is arguing the need for a plan… It’s just that your plan is stupid and won’t work.”

I always start that dungeon off with a smile.

LOL YES, ac always gives me a giggle too.

Not an insult as such but I really like it when Willoo says:
“Quaggan hates you and the egg you came from.”

KngGilgamesh.3481:

You ran from a skrit.

All of my THIS.

If skritt ever became a playable race, I have a vision of WvW. You’re there, running to your next objective, when you see an enemy player running by with every possible speed buff the game can muster. Then, just as you attempt to make chase, a wall of allied skritt players roll by, yelling “You ran from skritt!” and “You lose!”, while one stops, faces you, says “More come, yes?”, then rejoins the skrittpile.

I like the Asura insult “You’re dumb. You’ll die, and you’ll leave a dumb corpse.”

Azure Fang.8605:

KngGilgamesh.3481:

You ran from a skrit.

All of my THIS.

If skritt ever became a playable race, I have a vision of WvW. You’re there, running to your next objective, when you see an enemy player running by with every possible speed buff the game can muster. Then, just as you attempt to make chase, a wall of allied skritt players roll by, yelling “You ran from skritt!” and “You lose!”, while one stops, faces you, says “More come, yes?”, then rejoins the skrittpile.

Time to derail the thread with puns

1. The skritt hit the fan for that player.
2. Epic skrittstorm
3. Kicking the skritt out of the player

Back on topic, the dredge in the tunnel fractal has an epic line

“It keeeeens in outrage……the vermin”

This.

From a talking mole rat.

Mojo Gris Gris.5941:

My favorite quote happens to fall in the insults category. I really enjoyed handing the replica Ho-Ho-Tron a copper and having it say, “That was literally the least you could do.”

All of the Ho-Ho-Tron quotes are adorable. The replica Job-o-Tron backpack has some wonderful semi-insults toward the player as well.

“I expected a larger impact crater.”
“Score update: Gravity – 1; You – 0.”

The Asuran prodigy’s yo momma jokes (are they still in game? I couldn’t find a wiki reference)

Yo mamma’s so dumb, she thought a golemancer was what you get when you ask a golem question.

Azure Fang.8605:

KngGilgamesh.3481:

You ran from a skrit.

All of my THIS.

If skritt ever became a playable race, I have a vision of WvW. You’re there, running to your next objective, when you see an enemy player running by with every possible speed buff the game can muster. Then, just as you attempt to make chase, a wall of allied skritt players roll by, yelling “You ran from skritt!” and “You lose!”, while one stops, faces you, says “More come, yes?”, then rejoins the skrittpile.

Don’t forget the famous quote: “Shinnies~~~~”

And SE P1 dredge: “No no no, no no no, no no on” (endless loop)

Astral Projections.7320:

The Asuran prodigy’s yo momma jokes (are they still in game? I couldn’t find a wiki reference)

Yo mamma’s so dumb, she thought a golemancer was what you get when you ask a golem question.

that’d be funny

Azrael.4960:

Azure Fang.8605:

KngGilgamesh.3481:

You ran from a skrit.

All of my THIS.

If skritt ever became a playable race, I have a vision of WvW. You’re there, running to your next objective, when you see an enemy player running by with every possible speed buff the game can muster. Then, just as you attempt to make chase, a wall of allied skritt players roll by, yelling “You ran from skritt!” and “You lose!”, while one stops, faces you, says “More come, yes?”, then rejoins the skrittpile.

Time to derail the thread with puns

1. The skritt hit the fan for that player.
2. Epic skrittstorm
3. Kicking the skritt out of the player

Back on topic, the dredge in the tunnel fractal has an epic line

“It keeeeens in outrage……the vermin”

This.

From a talking mole rat.

My girls got big skritts

I skrit my pants(instead of crit obv)

“Many a wild beast have succumbed to my might”

“That reminds me, have I told you my wife is pregnant?”

Also, regarding some of the replies above, I vote that “Kitten” be replaced with “Skrit”.

One of my most favorite exchanges in the game in Bloodtide Coast.

Explorer Smatti in Bloodtide Coast:
Female Norn: I’m starting to think this is a fool’s errand you’ve brought us on little one.
Male Norn: And you’ve made DRY fools of us at that. When will we have those drinks you promised us?
Smatti: Now listen to me you miserable sots. We can return to camp when we have those artifacts and no sooner. ALSO, I never promised you drinks! It’s as if you only have a single thought between the two of you. Finish the job at hand!

Well, I caught Rytlock losing his temper…

Deamhan.9538:

“Many a wild beast have succumbed to my might”

“That reminds me, have I told you my wife is pregnant?”

Also, regarding some of the replies above, I vote that “Kitten” be replaced with “Skrit”.

I wholeheartedly second this. “Skritt” should replace “kitten” for the wordfilter.

SIDENOTE: I’m drunk off my skritt while posting this; took 3 minutes to post and edit. Skritt off.

i like that sexist svanir guy whos a skill point in wayfarer foothills.

Azure Fang.8605:

KngGilgamesh.3481:

You ran from a skrit.

All of my THIS.

If skritt ever became a playable race, I have a vision of WvW. You’re there, running to your next objective, when you see an enemy player running by with every possible speed buff the game can muster. Then, just as you attempt to make chase, a wall of allied skritt players roll by, yelling “You ran from skritt!” and “You lose!”, while one stops, faces you, says “More come, yes?”, then rejoins the skrittpile.

“More come, yes?”

Not so much an insult, but definetly the most uncomfortable NPC line in the game. And it just had to be said by a Skritt.

Not insults but…

“Who wants a product that gives you harpies?”
&
NPC1 – Do you think it is safe to have a shooting range so close to a tavern.
NPC2 – Sure, we only had one casualty in the last week.
&
“Look, I TOLD you I’m sorry; I didn’t MEAN to set your mother on fire!”
&
Char soldiers at Moorwatch Tower:
“Do you think cows migrate?”
“What?”
“You know, like birds.”
“Don’t be stupid. There’s no such thing as flying cows!”
“Maybe it was an exotic cow. From someplace far away.”
“Get it through you thick skull, there’s no such thing as flying cows!”
“Hey you hear that? I thought I heard a ‘Moo’ just now.”
“What?! Where?! Incoming!”
“Hahahah! Just kidding.”
“Do that again and I’ll kill you!”
&
Sylvari: Your golem is strange… was strange.
Asura: You drove it away, you know that!? I’ve never seen a golem run that fast.
Sylvari: I just wanted to ask it a few questions.
Asura: Yeah I know. you guys are full of them.
Sylvari: Oh, yes. What’s it like to be a golem? Does it dream? Does it have a family?
Asura: That was the last straw, you know. After that question about turtles in the desert you asked it about its mother.
Sylvari: So?
Asura: It doesn’t have a mother. It’s a golem. you crossed its circuits. I don’t know how you did it, but you weirded out MY golem.
Sylvari: So, you are the mother? Or the father?
Asura: What? Well, I… I guess I .. Oh no. you’re not getting in my head. You just stand there and help me monitor the gate.
Asura (to himself): Am I the mother? Blazing braces, this is what I get for working with the tree children.

Astral Projections.7320:

Not insults but…

“Who wants a product that gives you harpies?”
&
NPC1 – Do you think it is safe to have a shooting range so close to a tavern.
NPC2 – Sure, we only had one casualty in the last week.
&
“Look, I TOLD you I’m sorry; I didn’t MEAN to set your mother on fire!”
&
Char soldiers at Moorwatch Tower:
“Do you think cows migrate?”
“What?”
“You know, like birds.”
“Don’t be stupid. There’s no such thing as flying cows!”
“Maybe it was an exotic cow. From someplace far away.”
“Get it through you thick skull, there’s no such thing as flying cows!”
“Hey you hear that? I thought I heard a ‘Moo’ just now.”
“What?! Where?! Incoming!”
“Hahahah! Just kidding.”
“Do that again and I’ll kill you!”
&
Sylvari: Your golem is strange… was strange.
Asura: You drove it away, you know that!? I’ve never seen a golem run that fast.
Sylvari: I just wanted to ask it a few questions.
Asura: Yeah I know. you guys are full of them.
Sylvari: Oh, yes. What’s it like to be a golem? Does it dream? Does it have a family?
Asura: That was the last straw, you know. After that question about turtles in the desert you asked it about its mother.
Sylvari: So?
Asura: It doesn’t have a mother. It’s a golem. you crossed its circuits. I don’t know how you did it, but you weirded out MY golem.
Sylvari: So, you are the mother? Or the father?
Asura: What? Well, I… I guess I .. Oh no. you’re not getting in my head. You just stand there and help me monitor the gate.
Asura (to himself): Am I the mother? Blazing braces, this is what I get for working with the tree children.

You know i gotta hand it to anet, the dialogue is really funny half the time.

Wow’s was… real lackluster at times. I enjoy taking the time to listen and watch what goes on here.

I edited the topic to relfect quotes because insults was too specific

“to the lovers’ crypt!”

Mojo Gris Gris.5941:

My favorite quote happens to fall in the insults category. I really enjoyed handing the replica Ho-Ho-Tron a copper and having it say, “That was literally the least you could do.”

Yah, I gave HHT one copper every day just for his insults. Well, that and because I’m cheap and needed my daily.

My favorite was “That’s not a donation. That’s sarcasm.” The “Oh, look at the big spender here” and the one you posted are also great, though.

As for other favorites… I really like the Charr cubs in Diessa. The two outside talk about how they think the ruin is haunted because they’ve heard voices and wonder where their 3rd warband member has gone, then you find the entrance into the secret strawberry patch and what do you find? The 3rd cub is in there there singing. Quite a nice bit of inter-connection there.

And who can forget the conversation between the Charr lionguard and the Asura child in Lion’s Arch. “Your face is funny, all smooshed and weird”. “No, your face is funny, its like a little raisin”. I miss those two…

Oh, and the conversation between the Lionguard after the Corrupted Svanir event at the dome in Wayfarer. The norn is going to go drink in celebration, and the charr says maybe they shouldn’t because they’re on duty, to which the norn replies “I am Norn, ale goggles sharpen our vision, and ale fists hit hard”. And the charr comes back with “Is that so? Well, Charr fists hit hard all the time”.

Livor Crushspirit: Hey! You got your moa jerky in my yak butter!
Vloyat Crushmaw: You got your yak butter on my moa jerky!

or heard in Silverwastes

“I don’t know why we have to take orders from rats and and a bunch of cabbages”

When you first make a Norn the very first line that an NPC speaks to you is “HAIL, HERO!”

I die. Firstly because the female norn voices are so deadpan, and secondly because I’m NOT a hero. I JUST logged in. Are you sure you have the right person?

No one’s thrown up “there’s something in the water!” yet? It’s clearly the best line of dialogue in the entire game.

Progeny: Ha! I’m the dragon again, and Destiny’s Edge is too busy fighting each other to fight me. Die!
Cub: Scorch it all, the dragon got us! If only Logan didn’t run away and Eir was a better leader.
Child: Yeah? Well…if only Rytlock had stuck to the plan and Zojja wasn’t so cranky!
Progeny: Mmm, Destiny’s Edge tastes delicious. Now I shall conquer the world! Ah-ha-ha-ha!

I don’t know how often I’ve played that story step , but I still have to stop and watch the children play every time .

edit: although Zojja saying “Who are you two and what have you done with Logan and Rytlock?” in CoE story runs a close second in my list of favourites. editend

“Some of us are more evil than others.”

GW2 meme:
" No no no. We should go to the armory…"

“More violets i say, less violence” ……..

AHHH!

“Puts gun to head”

Favorite quote must be “More come, yes?” with that cute little voice.

For a while, I misheard the centaur quote “back me up” for “knock me up!”..no way in hell I will make out with a female centaur ! XD

Yamsandjams.3267:

No one’s thrown up “there’s something in the water!” yet? It’s clearly the best line of dialogue in the entire game.

I joked last weekend about this..
“you know you play GW2 too much when you took a dump in the toilet, looked back and stated this exact dialogue..” :P XD

“By Ogden’s Hammer, WHAT SAVINGS!”

“OoooooOOOOOhhhh! Box of shinies! So many shinies!”

“I told an Asura I wanted to learn how to cast spells. He said I’d just get a headache.”

“Ugh, this is so disgusting”>>>"It could be worse. This could be hot lava.">>>"You’re so stupid."

Belzebu.3912:

I like the Asura insult “You’re dumb. You’ll die, and you’ll leave a dumb corpse.”

BAM

Arcangel the Reaper.9418:

“By Ogden’s Hammer, WHAT SAVINGS!”

I kind of miss that guy, as repetitive as he was.

Well, then we die or bow down to our new goelm overlords.

It’s not really a quote, but I love the animation of skritt inspecting their rifles. This game needs more skrittness everywhere.

If there is one thing that i love in this game is the random dialog which I still have yet to fully experience. Honest to god, I just discovered the crazy char and his little rat friend Whiskers the other day. I just never went up there until recently.

Also, i love finding all of the Whispers agents once you become a member of the Order that are hidden all around tyria.

In the Labyrinthine Cliffs there were merchants that had stuff you could look at. Some of it summoned an enemy if you kept touching it. One of these merchants part way up the cliffs always greatly amused me:
Unusual Merchant, says with deadpan sarcasm, “Oh, no. Woe is me. Look, messing around with unknown forces has unleashed deadly consequences. Because this has never happened before.”

Oh, just remembered another good one, from the Asura after the Megadestroyer event. Something along the lines of…

“Haha, my brilliance wins again”
“Brilliant luck, maybe…”
" What?"
“I think she said something about wanting a duck”
“Lianne, if you ever want to have your own krewe one day, you need to think more about research and less about pets”

Actually, those 3 are pretty amusing throughout the entire event.

“Swimming, Swimming, Swimming
all Summer long!
Swimming, Swimming, Swimming
it makes your flippers strong!”

-Quaggan in Old Lion’s Arch

Arcangel the Reaper.9418:

“By Ogden’s Hammer, WHAT SAVINGS!”

I demand he be brought back.

This unit is now designated Herotron!

Happiness Mode…engaged!

IndigoSundown.5419:

Livor Crushspirit: Hey! You got your moa jerky in my yak butter!
Vloyat Crushmaw: You got your yak butter on my moa jerky!

Riba Crushheart: Rrrowr! Rrrrowr! (growl)
Livor Crushspirit: What are you doing?
Riba Crushheart: Duh. I’m practicing my growling technique.
Livor Crushspirit: Oh, I thought you were gonna throw up or something.

“I thought Charr were supposed to be scary.”
“I’m plenty scary!!!”
“I don’t know. I think you’re beautiful, and your fur is pretty great.”
“I AM NOT BEAUTIFUL!!! …although…my fur is pretty great, isn’kitten” chuckle “See you around, cub.”

Edit: Why oh why does the filter isn’kitten?

Mojo Gris Gris.5941:

“I thought Charr were supposed to be scary.”
“I’m plenty scary!!!”
“I don’t know. I think you’re beautiful, and your fur is pretty great.”
“I AM NOT BEAUTIFUL!!! …although…my fur is pretty great, isn’kitten” chuckle “See you around, cub.”

Edit: Why oh why does the filter isn’kitten?

If you look at the words, isn’t ‘it and disregard the spaces and the ’ you will see a word for a female body part. I have to say, the forum filter has been an education for me. I didn’t know there were so many words I needed to be shocked and offended by until I started reading these forums. ^^

RSLongK.8961:

GW2 meme:
" No no no. We should go to the armory…"

Think you missed out a few zillion No’s there XD

I like one of the quaggan-likes-you ones: ‘…nice teeth!’

And all of the skritt ones. All of them. ‘More come, yes?’ is truly adorable though.

I also like the exchange with the injured Asura from the Thaumanova Reactor – ‘Ouchie ouchie!’ ‘Yes. Ouchie, indeed.’

‘By Ogden’s Hammer, what savings!’ was the first quote I heard in the game that actually made me laugh out loud, I had no idea at that point that the NPCs would really be worth listening to

“stuff… stuff… STUFF!!!!!” -Skritt Burglar