I’m anti-social. I’d love to be all social and in there and chatting all the time and stuff… but I’m just not that person. I’m in a guild of one and a half (that half being my kid, and she only plays to have fun, and doesn’t do any form of progression. She likes to bunny-hop around), although I did do a guild once or twice before, and they weren’t really my sort of people to play with.
Whenever I’ve gotten myself in a group (I tend to think this a mistake on my part), I start to panic somewhat, and don’t feel I can live up to any expectation I imagine the other players may have (admittedly when I’m on the ranger, I should think their expectations are low). I still try to succeed, because I, with all my anti-social ridiculousness, can believe in a greater good and working for it, even if that means in a group situation. I don’t want to let them down, I absolutely hate that idea, and that’s why I’d usually avoid it if I feel too nervous. As dumb as that may be. Sometimes I’ve got to force myself through this stuff – and yeah, if it goes well, I’ll feel better afterwards. Even though it’s just a game, I’ll take it as a win and even use it in RL if I have to.
I haven’t found any concept of guild I feel totally comfortable with, even if on some days I feel like “today could be the day! I could join a guild today and it will be a good fit!” I never get past just looking at a Guild Launch page, or an ages old server guild list. I also know I’m just too chaotic when it comes down to it, and sooner or later, cannot be relied upon. Even if I want to be approaching reliable, I’m just not. Something happens and I switch off.
Forcing me into having to play socially with others breaks my mind. Well… it doesn’t, not really, nothing quite so dramatic. But I do have to be feeling unnaturally confident to succeed. I know I can succeed, I’ve done it before, and I try to be open to ideas and new things, but I don’t like being forced into something. I’d rather decide for myself, not have a game or others do it for me. If what I decide happens to coincide with the game or others, then I’m sure it’s all good. But I don’t feel so bad if it doesn’t, and I will do something else instead. I am acutely aware of my limitations, and if something is trying to run counter to this, I just won’t do it (so a lot of jumping puzzles and things like SAB are out).
The best thing about this game is I don’t have to do things with other people if I don’t want to. There’s really nothing here like that. It’s only if I decide I’m focused on achievements, or ending the personal story, or doing marionettes, or whatever, that I have to co-operate. And yet I still decide if I want to do that or not. I’m not forced into anything unless I put myself in that position in the first place – and if I do put myself there, it’s with the foreknowledge of it involving others. I wouldn’t necessarily describe this as a social environment, however. With some of the backchat and nasty comments, it’s anything but. Sociopathic, maybe. It’s certainly not healthy.
If I miss something I find interesting (anything story or lore related for example), either due to time or “forced” constraints, I’ll look it up on the Wiki or similar. It may not be the same as experiencing it first hand, but frankly, I have a hard time reading/watching stuff first hand owing to the panic of doing stuff with other people who want it done yesterday anyway (dungeon story modes, I’m looking at you!).
And this is why I choose to play this game. If forced grouping (like 99% of other MMO’s) became the normal, then I’d move along to something else. One of the big draws of this game is NOT having to rely on others to do most of the content.