As a gay man, I’m always humored by how many heterosexuals are so offended for me. I’ve had a lifetime of abuse and oppression. I can stand someone saying “gay.”
And in delicious irony, I once had someone use “the f word” (rhyming with maggot) to insult me. I responded that I was, in fact, one. I was banned from the game for a short period for hate speech. It was decided that I could not defend myself by devaluing the insult because the insult itself is deemed wrong by my heterosexual cultural superiors. Goodness forbid I take the insult and morph it into something to the point it loses its power. You know, like certain other words?
In speaking only for me, I don’t need your safe space. I don’t need to be protected from a word or words because you think they offend me. Take your benevolent sexism, racism, and homophobia somewhere else to swoop in and play the hero for someone else.
I’ve no need for your heroics. I do not need your projection onto me. You’re the one offended and made uncomfortable. I am not. You are using me, my experiences of oppression, and my population of people to justify your offense and your censoring response.
If needed, I can save myself, thanks.
I equally don’t know you at all, but it’s difficult to miss the massive chip on your shoulder. It’s kind of obvious in the sweeping assumptions you make about the sexuality and intentions of everyone else.
In any case, the ‘safe space’ exists. For everyone, whether they want it or not. You agreed to it when you accepted the ToS. I think a lot of people, myself included, like that it does exist. ‘Saving oneself,’ all the time, is incredibly tiresome. And usually pointless, when dealing with anonymous people on the internet. This is why we have moderators.
So you will (and should) indeed be banned for using homophobic language, no matter how you identify. A game is not the place to fight battles to reclaim language, or to expect people to have to save themselves. If you’ve had a lifetime of abuse and oppression, you shouldn’t wish it on others. Especially not in their leisure time, which is generally supposed to be about having fun.
Thank you for telling me what words I’m allowed to say AND how I’m allowed to say them! You see, I was under this impression that I’m allowed to identify myself and control my own personal reaction to things. I was clearly mistaken. I should know better that it is up to you to decide what words I can say, who I can be, and what tone I’m allowed to use.
Or, you know, not.
You keep trying to protect me FOR me. Stop it. That’s benevolent homophobia. You are telling me that I am somehow unable to handle the stress of a word. You are telling me that I am so feeble that I want—no NEED—you or someone else to protect me, decide what is fun for me, and then police my tone based upon what you think is appropriate.
It’s pedantic and it takes away a large amount of my self-determination. I am allowed to not be offended. You are allowed to be offended. I am not allowed to force you to listen to any words you don’t like, but you have no right to demand that words be erased from the world because they give you a sad.
You have a sad? That’s your problem, sweetheart. You need to cope with it. You need to adjust to it. You need to process it.
I stopped being offended by a word back when the United States of America took away my right to marry and gain access to over 1,000 rights for over a decade. I stopped being offended by a word when I was beaten and spat on. I stopped being offended by a word when I was disowned by family and friends because I was born.
And I hate to inform you of this, but I won’t be changing my tone, how I speak, words I use, or my identity because you decided that it makes you go “:(”. I spent my entire life having people tell me who I’m allowed to be while simultaneously deciding who I am for me.
That chip on my shoulder?
That’s from people much like yourself who think they have the right to tell me who I can be, what I can say, how I can say it, and what or who I can identify as.
Now you have a wonderful day/evening!